


The Force Likes Reylo

by Nerd_Mom_Writer



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Force Bond (Star Wars), Romance, Romantic Comedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-17
Updated: 2018-05-17
Packaged: 2019-05-08 09:38:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 24,868
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14691474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nerd_Mom_Writer/pseuds/Nerd_Mom_Writer
Summary: COMPLETE. Reylo fanfic set after The Last Jedi. Kylo Ren escapes an assassination attempt from Hux by boarding the Millennium Falcon with Rey and Chewie. If you want Reylo to be healthy, fun, and in-character, check my story out and let me know if I succeeded.





	1. Chapter 1

Kylo Ren stared at the displays before him at a loss. The loss of their best ship had been a notable blow against the First Order, and without Snoke’s vision, Kylo Ren was not entirely sure what to do. The Resistance had escaped on the Falcon, and he had no leads on Skywalker after the encounter with Luke’s force-image on Crait. 

Then again, his connection to Rey remained. 

“Supreme Leader, your orders?” General Hux asked from his side. Kylo Ren sensed the barely suppressed mutinous rage and indignation in the general's thoughts. 

“We will need a new flagship and time to rebuild our fleet.”

“I have a potential flagship in mind. I will see that we set course to view it. Supreme Leader, what of the Resistance?”

Kylo Ren replayed his last connection with Rey in his head yet again. Snoke would have known what to do with this weakness he had, the light and dark in him that yearned for her, but Snoke was dead now, Rey had abandoned him, and Kylo Ren was more alone than ever.

“The Resistance now consists of less than 50 people aboard a single outdated freighter. They will not be a threat for some time.”

“But Ren, Skywalker and the girl--”

Kylo Ren force-gripped Hux’s throat and lifted him. “You will call me Supreme Leader.” Hux nodded with wide, panicked eyes, and Kylo Ren dropped him. “I will see to the matters of Skywalker and the girl personally, Hux. Set the coordinates for the shipyard and do not disturb me.”

Kylo Ren marched to his private quarters, threw his lightsaber across the room, and punched the wall. When Snoke was alive, his destructive tantrums had been met with distaste, but now that he was Supreme Leader, the stormtroopers reacted more strongly. He would have to tame himself or endure a mutiny, and while he could survive a mutiny, he did not want to waste his resources. As Snoke said, even Hux had his uses.

Kylo Ren released a flurry of blunt attacks on his walls and furniture before collapsing in a chair. He needed control. Snoke had control. Darth Vader had control. He had to learn it too, but there were no masters left except Skywalker.

Rey.

The connection hadn't been severed with Snoke’s death, which meant Snoke likely had nothing to do with it, which meant it was in their control, somehow. After all, hadn't he been thinking of her that first time? And the others? Perhaps it had been up to him all along.

Kylo Ren closed his eyes and reached out through the Force. He thought of how it had felt to fight her, to fight alongside her, the warmth of her small hands that moment they touched.

“Rey,” he said. The force connected them, and she was there.

“--to override the warp speed,” she said, looking at someone he couldn't see. Rey glanced at him before continuing, “Actually, why don't you go ahead and take a break. I've got things here. Yes, I'm sure. Take your time.”

Rey stared off a few moments before turning to Kylo Ren. “Hello Ben, or is it Supreme Leader now?”

Kylo Ren took a deep breath. He had meant to jump directly into demanding where Luke Skywalker was, but seeing her again, hearing her call him his given name, even with a frustrated tone… it was like the loneliness of the last couple days dissipated in that moment.

“Come to spy on the Resistance? Or make another plea that I switch sides after you tried to kill me and everyone I loved on Crait?”

His eyes narrowed. No, he was alone as he ever was. “Where's Luke Skywalker?”

Her eyes widened, as if that were the last thing she expected. “You didn't feel it in the force? He's dead. Ben, your uncle is dead.”

Kylo Ren’s jaw dropped, and he laughed in relief, falling to his knees. Luke Skywalker was no more. He was done. He would never have to fear waking up to that man's lightsaber again.

And then he was slapped. “How dare you?” Rey said, pulling her hand away to clench it in a fist.

“How dare I? You know what that monster did to me!”

Rey stepped back, her eyes downcast. “I know he let you down, Ben, but how can you be so callous--” she broke off in a sob and sank down to hug her knees.

Kylo Ren reached out and tentatively touched her hand. She flicked it off and glared daggers at him. “I don't want the comfort of a monster.”

Kylo Ren felt anger consume him as her rejection split his core. “You held my hand before, was I different then? You knew I was a monster. I've killed hundreds with my own hands, trillions through the Order. You even saw my blade kill my own father, but now that I express relief that someone who betrayed and tried to murder me is dead, you cannot bear my touch?”

Rey was silent outside gentle sobbing. Kylo felt his fury grow that Rey would be so broken over a murderer like Luke. He shifted to stand when he noticed Rey’s posture had changed. She still cried into her knees, but one hand reached out to him in silent invitation.

Kylo Ren felt all his pent-up rage flow out in a moment. He could not harbor such fury while she accepted him. He knelt forward and took the offered hand, carefully enclosing her hand in his. 

“I feel so alone, Ben. I'm surrounded by people, and they're wonderful to me, but they have no idea what I'm going through. Luke was not much of a teacher, but at least he understood.”

“I understand,” Kylo Ren said softly, but the connection ended in the moment. Kylo Ren stayed on the floor a moment before standing up, looking helplessly at where his hand had held hers, and feeling the warmth of the touch fade.

Luke Skywalker was dead, and Rey was angry, yes, but she had not given up on him. She had passed on his offer to lead the First Order at his side, but she hadn't turned him down yet, not completely.

Kylo Ren clenched his fist. He might yet see his vision of her by his side come true.


	2. Chapter 2

“Am I the only person who knows how to keep this piece of junk in the sky!?” Rey exclaimed as she raced across the Falcon with the replacement hyper-coil for the engine. Chewie was on-planet shopping for replacement parts, and BB-8 had gone with Poe in search of a new fighter jet, which left Rey the only technically competent person on board.

“I'm doing the best I can, Mistress Rey, but I am a protocol droid. I am not designed for repair work,” Threepio stated while stumbling behind her with a box of other parts should the coil not work. Artoo was already in the innards surrounded by wires and fuses.

“Here, Artoo. This should do the trick. We have to make the fuel last until the others return. If only this planet had a stable orbit like most proper worlds.”

The patch worked and Rey let out a whoop of delight, alerting the others to her success. Kaydel Ko Connix smiled down with her signature buns tied on each side of her head. Rey had heard they were modeled to copy a style General Leia Organa used in her youth, and the thought of the general with such a whimsical hairstyle always made her smile a bit.

“So all done? How much time do we have now?” Kaydel asked.

“At least several days, I think. Plenty of time for the others to get back. Any updates?”

Kaydel nodded. “General Organa has found a group of smugglers who are open to joining us. Apparently the Order has clamped down so tightly on shipping that they're unable to get work. They're insisting on their own leadership, however, so it's uncertain. Poe hasn't had much luck securing a fighter though. At this rate, he may have to steal one.”

Rey froze as Ben's description of the Resistance came to mind. What was it he said? A band of thieves and murderers? She sighed, acknowledging the truth of it, but they were still better than the Order, scaring people into submission and destroying worlds at a whim. Rey may have been a scavenger, but she was not a thief, or hadn't been until she had been forced to take the Falcon to save their lives. She was not a murderer, or hadn't been until she had been forced to defend herself as part of the Resistance.

“Rey, you okay?” 

Rey forced a smile on her face to reassure Kaydel. “Yea, I'm fine. Just been a lot going on.” Rey thought of all the people she was getting to know in the Resistance. Whatever they had to do, they weren't bad people. They were not so far from the light as Ben. Just thinking about how far Ben had gone astray made Rey wish for a friend. “Where's Finn?”

“Rose’s side. He's been very kind to her. It's exciting seeing them together!”

Rey smiled. “And what of you and Poe?” Kaydel’s eyes shot open. “Don't look so frightened, it's obvious you care for him. You had his back through the escape.”

“Of course I did, me and a half dozen others!”

Rey knew this was true, but she also saw the slight blush in Kaydel’s cheeks and how often Kaydel's eyes glanced at Poe when he was around. Rather than responding, Rey smiled at the other girl before leaving to find Finn and Rose.

She found the corridor to the med room and almost knocked when she felt the thick tension emanating through the force. 

“Finn, please, tell me how you feel about me,” Rose said. Rey bit her lip and stepped away, heading to her own quarters. It was one thing to visit with friends, but another to interrupt an intimate moment.

Rey dropped back in her bunk and sighed. Intimacy was not something she had known or even wanted, really. Scavenging for herself was bad enough without worrying about others. Still, she had a new life now. It was possible, not that she had anyone in mind, except that... The memory of holding Ben's hand flashed to mind, and suddenly the force put him before her.

Rey froze, wishing she could back out and not knowing how. After a moment, Ben glanced at her. “Thinking of me?” Ben said. He was standing and looking intently at something she couldn't see. 

“No!” Rey exclaimed in an unsteady voice. Ben raised an eyebrow. She rolled her eyes and crossed her arms in a huff. “What are you looking at, anyway?”

“Reports on where the Falcon might be hiding. You wouldn't save me the trouble by telling me where you are, would you?”

Rey glared at him. “I'd sooner bathe in bantha dung.”

“Are you sure you didn't? When did you last bathe?” Ben said, stepping away from the screen to draw closer to her. Rey’s eyes went wide and she lifted an arm to take a good whiff of her armpits. A snort escaped Ben, and she realized he was teasing her. She grabbed her pillow and chucked it at him. Ben caught it easily and handed it back, smiling gently.

“Well you're in a good mood. I don't think I've ever seen you smile before. It's creepy,” Rey said.

Ben's smile faltered. “I've not had many reasons to smile. That's something we have in common.”

Rey frowned. “No, maybe when I was still on Jakku that was true, but I have plenty to smile about now, even with all the loss and chaos. I have friends now. The Resistance, they're like my family.” She smiled as she spoke, thinking fondly on their faces.

Ben glared at her. “You don't know them like I do. I was a kid, Rey, and they were so terrified of me that they shipped me off to Luke rather than let me help them. Luke, who feared me so much he tried to kill me. They may as well have tried to kill me themselves.”

“They were doing their best, Ben. They loved you. Your mother still loves you. You can still come back and start over, Ben.”

Ben scoffed. “Death is the only welcome I would receive in the Resistance. Furthermore, I no longer share their naive ideologies of how the universe should work. The New Republic my mother tried to form in the fall of the Empire was wrought with chaos and corruption. Entire worlds starved while the government argued over rules and trade agreements. The powerful had no one to keep them in line. It was disgusting. The universe needs order, Rey. We are not good or evil, Rey. We are the desperately needed order in the universe.”

Rey was silent as she considered his perspective. Having grown up in near starvation on a planet not regulated by the order, she could see the merit of what he said. However, “What about freedom and choice? Finn said you conditioned him to be a stormtrooper since he was a baby. He never had a choice, Ben.”

Ben narrowed his eyes at her. “That traitor would not have survived infancy if we hadn't enrolled him into our stormtrooper program. All our stormtroopers are from families who can't afford additional children. Why do you think there is so much support for the First Order? We're saving countless lives, giving people purpose where there would have been death. Food where there would have been starvation. Order where there would have been chaos. The Rebellion against the Empire made more sense. The Empire sought to rule through fear. The First Order protects and sustains its member planets.”

Rey was speechless for several seconds as Ben's eyes bore into her own. “But how do you explain Snoke? He was clearly evil--”

“I don't deny it, and I have made my own share of dark side choices, as Luke used to describe them. Power is necessary to maintain order, and there is much power in fear and anger. You have felt it too, sought it, even embraced it when searching for the identity of your parents.” He paused and caught his breath. “Rey, my offer stands. When you're ready to let go of the Resistance, join me. Please.”

Rey shook her head, tears forming in her eyes. “I can't, Ben. I couldn't even sell a droid for food rations when I was starving. How could I possibly stand by your side while you slaughter my friends?”

“They're not your friends, Rey. They don't know you like I do.”

“No, and they didn't use the force to invade my thoughts like you did. They are my friends. You said once I was nothing to anyone but you, but you're wrong. I'm something to them too. Even before they knew I had the force, they welcomed me and risked their lives for me, Ben. They may not understand the force, but I'm not the one without friends. That’s you. They welcomed me, a nobody. They welcomed Finn, a stormtrooper. Who's to say they wouldn't give you a chance too?”

“Have you forgotten I'm leading a war against them?” Ben said.

Rey sighed. “Well, I guess we're done here,” she said and the connection ended. She sighed and rubbed the heel of her hand against her forehead, then realized she wasn’t alone in the room. Finn stood gaping at her from the entryway.

“You can talk to Kylo Ren!?”


	3. Chapter 3

Rey fell out of her bed and looked up in shock to see Finn in the room. “Finn, how long have you been here?”

“Long enough. How could you, Rey? And really, how can you? Is this some weird force thing? Does he know where you are? Does General Organa know? Does anybody know? How can you do this? Are you betraying the Resistance? You sounded kinda chummy with a guy who is our DEADLIEST ENEMY.”

“And also the only son of the general and Han Solo and an extremely powerful user of the force, Finn. How could I not try to bring him back?”

“Umm, by not. Have you forgotten how many people he's killed? I watched him slaughter an entire village on my first combat mission, you know. He's full dark, Rey. You can't help someone like that. He slaughtered his own dad, remember? He tried to kill both of us too.”

“He's no worse than Vader was, Finn, and Vader was saved. I see the light in him, Finn. I've seen,” she paused, realizing the Resistance was better off not knowing Luke's mistake and how many private conversations she had with Ben, “so many things. I can't give up on Ben while that light is still there.”

“You think you can change him, Rey? You can't change a person who doesn't want to change. I know that more than anyone. The Order couldn't make me a stormtrooper. You can't make Kylo Ren a Jedi.”

Rey glared at her friend. “You're right, but that doesn't mean I should close the door on him,” she said, though she blushed as she recalled that she had done exactly that when they escaped the Order. “I'm not some naive little girl, Finn. I won't get sucked in by his darkness. I'm just making sure he doesn't forget that the light is still there for him too.”

Finn nodded with pursed lips and hands on hips. “Right. You're insane. I'm going to notify the general.”

“No!” Rey said, and slammed the door shut with the force.

Finn tried to open the door, failed, gave it another attempt, slammed it, and rolled his shoulders to face Rey. “Seriously, Rey? You're no better than him if you keep me prisoner with the force. The general needs to know what is happening, at least to know you are a security risk.”

“I'm not a security risk!”

Finn’s eyebrows shot up. “Oh really? You can have casual conversations with the Supreme Leader of the First Order from light years away through the force, and you don't think you're a security risk?”

“It's like radioing someone, only we can see and touch each other, but we can't see each other's surroundings.”

“Wait wait wait, you can touch him through this force thing? How did you figure that out? When he tried to kill you in your sleep?” 

Rey shook her head in disbelief. “He's not going to try and kill me--”

“I can think of a few times he has!”

Rey frowned, acknowledging Finn’s point. “Okay, yes, he's tried to kill me, but the force connection is different. And who's to say I wouldn't use it to kill him in his sleep?”

Finn brought his hand to his mouth in excitement. “Yea, yea, you could, couldn't you. Alright, new plan, let's tell the general--”

“Stop, Finn! I'm not going to try and kill him, and he won't try to kill me. He wants me to join him and rule at his side.”

“Oh my god, you got a marriage proposal from the Supreme Leader.”

“Not a marriage proposal! At least, I don't think so,” Rey said, thinking back to the connection where Ben had no shirt on. “He's lonely. He wants a friend. He wants to teach me about the force.”

Finn looked Rey up and down quickly and waggled his eyebrows. “I expect he wants to teach you about a lot more than just the force.”

“Finn!” Rey exclaimed. She was at her wits’ end. “How can I explain this so you stop looking at me like I've lost my mind?”

“You can't. You have lost your mind, and we need to tell General Organa right now. Ooh, maybe it's some kind of Jedi mind trick thing. She's a force user too, right? Maybe she can help. Don't worry, Rey, we'll get you seeing sense again soon enough.”

Ray blinked back tears, but she let the door open for Finn to leave. “Fine,” she croaked. After all, maybe Finn was right. Maybe she was mad. She sank into her bed and let her exhaustion take her.


	4. Chapter 4

“Why are you crying, Rey?” She felt someone approach her side and gently brush away a tear that had rolled down her cheek. “Sleeping? I won't disturb you then.”

“Ben?” she whispered, but she was alone once more.

The next time she woke, it seemed the entire Resistance was in the bunk room arguing. She sat up abruptly, bewildered by the scene before her. 

“She has to leave! She's too dangerous!” called one person. 

“She's our hero and the last jedi. We can't just kick her out!” another responded.

“Quiet!” General Leia Organa stated. The room fell silent. “Rey, I do apologize for how you were awakened, but the news traveled quickly that you have some kind of force connection where you can interact with my s--with Kylo Ren. This is true?”

Rey nodded with an ashen face, and the room immediately erupted in chaos. Rey searched for Finn but didn't see him. Had he told everyone? Why?

General Organa clapped loudly, silencing the room once more. “I want everyone out of this room but Poe, Finn, and Rey.” People filtered out until it was just the general, Poe, and Rey. General Organa looked around with a confused expression. “Where is Finn?” 

“With Rose, I believe. I suspect he feels too ashamed to face Rey after incidentally blurting the news on the open Resistance channel,” Poe explained.

The general rolled her eyes and sat down next to Rey on the bed. “Very well. It's just us then. Rey, how long has this connection existed with Ben?”

“You mean Kylo Ren, General,” Poe corrected.

The general gave him a sideways glance. “He's my son, Poe. He may have gone very far from home, but he's still my son, and I will address him by his given name when allowed the luxury of doing so. I understand that Rey also calls him Ben, and does he protest this, Rey?”

Rey shook her head. “No, he doesn't protest it with me.”

“General Organa, I think the world of Rey following what she's done for us, but you must see how dangerous this situation is for the Resistance,” Poe interjected.

“Dangerous, yes, but also opportune. Ben would not let just anyone call him by his name these days. He must have a soft spot for our Rey. The question is, can we utilize it to our advantage without jeopardizing our mission?”

“Rey, can you see where he is or what he's doing?” Poe asked.

She shook her head. “This last meeting, he was looking at screens I couldn't see and said he was searching for us. He asked if I'd reveal our location to him. I didn't, of course, but I don't think he knows where I am or what's around me anymore than I can with him.”

“It could be a bluff,” Poe said, but the general shook her head.

“My son has been many things, but he's always been honest with those around him. Still, we don't know that the nature of these powers won't change. Rey, do you know if the force connection can take place in times of vulnerability? Like when you're asleep?”

Rey shook her head, then nodded cautiously, recalling her recent dream and touched her cheek. “I think he actually visited me while I was napping just now. I'm not sure what triggers the connection.”

Poe and the general exchanged a long look. “Rey, I'm sorry, but we may need you to leave the Resistance while we sort this out,” general Organa said.

Rey flinched as if she had been struck. “No, I want to stay. I want to help!” 

“I don't believe Ben would harm you necessarily, but he has no reason to hold back from the others. If he were to ever expand the connection, we would all be in danger,” the general said. “Poe, surely we have some kind of tracking device she could take with her should either of us need help, right?”

Poe scratched his head. “Umm, probably. I'll go see what our options are. There's another issue though: the ship. It's effectively hers according to Chewie, and we don't have spares. That's what I was looking for in the market today before Finn blabbed to everyone on the wrong channel.”

Rey stared at them. “You want me to give up the Falcon.” She took in a deep breath. “I--”

Chewie bellowed and barged in the room. “Chewie!” Rey exclaimed. Chewie mewed at them in turn. 

“Chewie, it will be very dangerous, and you don't even know that you'll see Ben,” the general said. Chewie bellowed in her face. “Well alright, but there's still the matter of getting a ship.”

A knock came on the door and Kaydel entered. “My apologies, but I thought you should know. The smuggling ring heard the news and are offering whatever assistance necessary in getting Rey as far from them as possible immediately to prevent her from drawing Kylo Ren here. They're going to give us a new freighter.”

The general opened her mouth in a perfect small circle. “Well, that settles things, doesn't it? Rey, we'll make sure that the Falcon is updated and repaired before you and Chewie head out. May the force be with you.”


	5. Chapter 5

Kylo Ren woke from his rest with an odd premonition that something was very, very wrong. There were no reports waiting for him, and his room was unusually warm. Furthermore, the ship felt silent, as if he were the only person aboard.

Kylo Ren frowned and reached out with the force. The ship was indeed empty. He raced out of his quarters and sprinted to the bridge. A sun blazed before him, far too close and directly in the ship's path. “No, no, no…”

Kylo Ren reached into the force, trying to change the ship's path that way, but his heart hammered too hard for the focus he needed. He ran for the escape pods next, but they had all been ejected. The hangar was empty as well. He had no escape, except perhaps...

“Rey,” he said, projecting himself through the force as well as he was able. “Rey, I need your help.” He had brought the rain back from a previous connection, perhaps she could bring him out of this.

The bond clicked into place, and there she was, sitting before him.

“Ben’s here,” she said to someone he couldn't see. “Relax, he's not going to hurt me, Chewie. Yes, I know he attacked us in the Falcon, but we're past that. Honestly, I’m not sure he even knew we were on board at the time.”

He had lost too much time looking for a normal exit. The sun was too close. 

Kylo Ren didn't waste time explaining himself. He leapt into Rey’s lap, ignoring her squeal of discomfort and surprise, removed his feet from the star destroyer he had been on, and wrapped his arms around her tightly as he held himself up from the ground. The Star Destroyer and sun disappeared and his senses filled with the interior of the Falcon. He severed the force connection even as Rey tried shoving him off and Chewie bellowed at him. Kylo Ren panted a moment, catching his breath, and then saw Chewie swing a fist at him.

Kylo Ren reached through the force to stop Chewie at the same moment Rey shouted, “Stop!” Chewie froze, though Kylo Ren was not sure if that was from his efforts or Chewie’s own self-restraint. “Ben,” Rey said, looking up at him with shock. “You're here, in the Falcon. How did you..?” 

Kylo Ren carefully stood up out of Rey’s lap while maintaining a hand on her shoulder, which, to his amazement, she did not protest. “Rey, do you feel anything?” 

Rey glanced at his hand and blushed slightly. “Other than your hand on my shoulder..?”

“The connection, Rey! Has it been severed or am I still partially somewhere else?”

“I don't feel the connection. You're here, Ben. You're with me. You came to me,” Rey said and folded her hand over the one on her shoulder. Kylo Ren didn’t notice as his rage at being betrayed filled him. He ripped his hand free, pulled his lightsaber from his belt, ignited it, and directed his fury into it. 

“No!” Rey screeched and gripped his lightsaber through the force just before he made contact with a holo game board. Kylo Ren struggled against her, and Rey stood up, grabbing the lightsaber hilt with her own hands before turning it off. “You can't just barge in on us and destroy our ship, Ben!”

Kylo Ren glared at her, but she met the ferocity in his eyes. “They tried to kill me!” he growled at her.

Rey's face blanched. “You're not talking of the Resistance, are you?” Kylo Ren met her gaze, and she slipped into his mind in her curiosity. She glimpsed his unease on waking up in the abandoned ship and his escalating fear as he discovered each escape route eliminated. Kylo Ren’s rage grew at her casual invasion, and he thought to take it out on her when she stepped forward and hugged him tightly. “Oh Ben, you could have been killed.”

Kylo Ren's wrath scattered in his confusion at being held. No one had hugged him since before he entered training under Luke. “You would have grieved me,” he stated, gazing at Rey. 

She glanced up at him with tear-filled eyes and said in an anguished voice, “Of course! I care about you!” 

Kylo Ren carefully wrapped his arms around Rey, returning the hug and struggling to calm his anger. “Thank you. I do not know that anyone else would have missed me.”

Chewie bellowed then and charged them, picking them both up in a fierce wookie hug. Kylo Ren stared at Chewie in shock. “But you tried to kill me last time we met…” Chewie shrugged and held them tighter, causing both Rey and Kylo Ren to grimace.

“Chewie, I'm not the same boy you helped Han and Leia raise. That boy has died, and I, Kylo Ren of the Knights of Ren, am all that is left. Don't confuse me with Ben Solo.”

Chewie dropped them into a tangled huddle and bellowed more, gesturing at Rey. “Rey is special,” Kylo Ren said, and absentmindedly stroked Rey's hair. She quickly backed up out of his embrace, looking bewildered, and Kylo Ren felt his heart fill with indignation at being so simply rejected. Chewie laughed at Kylo Ren, fueling his anger, but a glance at Rey's fearful face cooled him.

“So what's next?” Rey asked. “Are you joining the Resistance?” Her face shown with hope, and Kylo Ren felt a stab of annoyance that she was so set on bringing him into the Resistance. Come to think of it, weren't the Resistance on the Falcon?

He reached out in the force, but the only life signatures he found besides himself, Rey, and Chewie appeared to be some kind of mindless birds gathered in the hold. “Where is the Resistance?”

Rey and Chewie exchanged mournful looks. “They found out about our connection and asked me to leave,” Rey explained. “They said it wasn’t safe.”

Kylo Ren felt his heart go out to Rey. “I warned you they would. I wish I could have spared you the pain.”

“Well, they thought you might be able to expand the connection to spy on or attack us. They were absolutely right to fear it, but we can explain that you're on our side--”

“I'm not. The First Order needs me, no matter how little they realize it. I will be assembling the Knights of Ren. You could join us, you know. They are other force users, like yourself. Like me, they are neither sith nor jedi. They exist to help establish order using whatever tools are necessary. Come with me, Rey. You would be welcome among us. They are the other pupils of Skywalker that escaped the night he tried to kill me.”

At this statement, Chewie let out a loud roar and tried to attack Kylo Ren. Both Rey and Kylo held up their hands to block Chewie with the force. Chewie whimpered at Rey when he realized she was restraining him too.

Rey took a deep breath. “Chewie, I heard it from Luke himself. He did mean to kill Ben in Ben's sleep. He… changed his mind, but not before Ben woke and saw Luke standing over him with a lightsaber.” 

Chewie let out an anguished roar and covered his face. “I know, Chewie. I could hardly believe it myself. He saved the rebellion, saved his father, and yet failed his nephew.”

Kylo Ren doubted that Luke had really changed his mind, but it was in the past. “The students had already separated into two groups at that time. One group had blind faith in Luke, and we had to kill them or be killed ourselves once they saw there was a conflict. They never would have believed I didn’t start it. The rest judged things for themselves and escaped with me to become the Knights of Ren under the Order. They would welcome you too, Rey.”

Rey nodded. “Meeting them might not be a bad idea. Maybe some of them would be interested in joining the Resistance.”

Kylo Ren gave her a look of pure disgust. “You could be so much more than the pet of the Resistance, Rey. Are they all you care about?”

Rey smiled and shook her head. “Of course not. After all, I care about you. Chewie, let Ben choose our destination to meet the Knights of Ren.”

Chewie fussed at Rey. “Why not?” Chewie complained more. “No, I don't think this is a trap, Chewie.” Chewie roared at her. “Well I'm going with him regardless, so you can either help me or leave.”

Chewie looked sadly at Rey and Kylo Ren before gesturing for Kylo to follow him.


	6. Chapter 6

Rey puzzled with the communicator while stretched out in her bunk. Poe had set it up so that she and Chewie could communicate with the Resistance without either group revealing their locations, but they hadn't had time to establish how Rey would know who was on the other end. She imagined how Finn would react if he learned that Ben was with her. Then again, the change in ranks could be valuable information for the Resistance, so she should share at least that much, but would sharing it mean betraying Ben, who might finally be learning to trust her?

Rey threw her head back against her pillow and returned the communicator back to her cubby. It was all too much for her to think about. Instead, she pulled out a book on intergalactic politics that General Organa had recommended from the Falcon’s paltry selection. It all went over her head, but Rey supposed she had to get a handle on politics sooner or later. Her brief history lessons with Luke showed that force users were frequently involved at the heads of governments.

 She felt Ben enter the room before she saw him. His presence in person was like a smoldering fire in the back of her mind since she had trained, nothing like what she felt from anyone else. She looked up from her book to meet his eyes as he rounded the corner. Ben maintained the eye contact, eyebrows slightly furrowed, as if he were just as mystified as she was to be alone together in person.

 “Where should I..?” Ben said, gesturing to the various bunks in the room.

 “Oh, anywhere you like. Chewie says the bunks are too small for him, so it's just…” Rey's voice faltered as she realized the implication of her words. They would be sleeping in this room alone. “Right. What do you normally do? In your free time?”

 Ben sat down on the bunk across from her and entered a meditation pose. “Work, normally.” Rey tried not to think too much about how much his work involved interrogating and attacking members of the Resistance. “However, I meditate and practice my stances when I can.”

 Rey nodded, thinking of all the time she had spent meditating and practicing fighting moves on the island with Luke. “Yes, me too.”

 “I could practice with you, if you like,” Ben said. Rey jumped from her bunk so eagerly she tripped on her foot and all but fell into Ben, who caught her and helped her back up. He gave her an amused smirk, and she got goosebumps as her heart pounded against her ribcage. “You won't need the book, though I would be honored to teach you what I know of governance as well. Have you repaired your lightsaber?”

 Rey exhaled slowly as her heart returned to normal and quickly returned the book to her cubby. She had forgotten she had even been holding it. “My lightsaber is still broken. I don't know how to repair it.”

 Ben nodded. “I suspected as much. I’ll show you how. Our first destination is the knight who manages our weapons production, including lightsabers. She will have the tools you will need. For now, we'll practice without weapons. Follow me.”

 They went to the lounge, which Rey acknowledged was probably the largest open space on the ship. Ben stopped suddenly in the middle of the room with his back facing her, and Rey stumbled to avoid walking into him. “Attack me,” he said.

 Rey froze. She was not used to attacking except in self-defense or battlezones, and the absence of either lightsaber or staff bothered her. Furthermore, she thought they would be practicing stances, not mock-fighting. “You want me to fight you? Not just practice stances?”

 “Stances are the best option when there is no partner to fight against, but we will both learn more through challenging each other.” When she didn’t move, he turned slowly to face her. “Fight me. Where is that viciousness you had when I interrogated you? Or during our first force connection when you shot your blaster at me?”

 Rey froze. She had completely forgotten she had done that. “Were you injured?”

 Ben was silent a moment, gazing at her. A glint appeared in his eyes, and he asked, “Would you like to check?” He raised his eyebrow and lifted the hem of his shirt an inch. His face was calm, but there was no mistaking the unspoken challenge. They both knew how flustered his bare chest had made her.

 Rey gave him an indignant look. “Keep your shirt on!”

 Ben stared at her and carefully lifted his hem a fraction more while maintaining eye contact. Rey narrowed her eyes, grabbed the hem, and shoved it down. Ben offered her a careful smile and knocked her sideways using the force. Rey yelped as she tumbled to the ground. Ben waited until she caught her breath and slowly lifted the hem of his shirt again.

 Rey force stopped his hand and kicked her leg out in a sweeping motion, which Ben dodged. Ben countered by pulling her off the ground and attempting to toss her, but Rey twisted in his grip and slammed him down to the ground underneath her, tucking her legs under his thighs to pin him in place. Ben wrapped an arm around her waist and just started pulling her off to the side when they heard Chewie roar and froze, meeting eyes in the shared terror of being caught in a compromising position by an overprotective wookie.

 Rey force-lifted Chewie to keep him from attacking Ben, but not before Chewie grabbed her by her shirt. Next thing she knew, she and Chewie were both awkwardly hanging in the space above Ben. Ben stared wide-eyed at them for a moment before his lips quivered and he snorted.

 “Did you just snort?” Rey asked Ben. Ben took a deep breath, stilled his face, took another look at them, and started laughing in earnest as Chewie started whimpering and flailing. Chewie moaned his misery. “Oh calm down, Chewie. I'm not about to let you rip the arms off my practice partner.” Chewie huffed in clear disapproval and dropped Rey, who landed roughly on Ben. The fall broke her own hold on Chewie, and the wookie toppled down beside them.

 Ben wrapped an arm around Rey’s shoulders and buried his head in the crook of Rey’s neck as he struggled to catch his breath between his laughter and Rey’s impact knocking the wind from his lungs.

 “You’re laughing,” Rey said in shock. “Genuinely laughing.” She chuckled herself, but shrieked when she felt two large furry arms lifting and moving her away from Ben. “Chewie! I can move myself.” Chewie moaned at her. “I was not flirting with him. We were practicing fighting!” Chewie roared. “I was not in his lap!”

 Ben, still coughing and struggling to stop chuckling, held up his index finger. “No, Chewie's right. You were in my lap.”

 Rey stared at Ben in surprise for a moment before she remembered that she had fallen on him and hadn't moved. He had even wrapped an arm around her and leaned on her. Why hadn't she moved away? _Was he doing something to her defenses?_

  _I'm not. I didn't know you knew how to force speak._ Ben’s voice appeared in her mind. _Might be a better way of speaking next time we're apart if you don't want to risk seeing my bare chest._

 Ben raised a knowing eyebrow at her, still smiling, and Rey blushed bright red. _Get out of my head, Ben!_

  _Ladies first, Rey._

 Chewie roared again, grabbed Rey by the arm, and pulled her with him to the cockpit.


	7. Chapter 7

“Chewie, I'm not flirting with him!” Rey said for what felt like the hundredth time. “And no, he's not flirting with me either. He’s just riling me up to make me a more effective combat partner.” Her thoughts went back to Finn’s accusation that Ben had proposed marriage to her, and she realized she wasn't at all certain what Ben's intentions were with her.

He wanted to teach her. He wanted to rule the galaxy with her. He wanted to spar with her. He definitely wanted her at his side, but was it something more than friendship he sought? What would that even be like?

A large, furry paw waved in her face. “What? Yes, I was paying attention,” she said on reflex, though she realized a moment later that might not have been true. “Wait, what? Chewie, that's really not necessary. Ben and I can handle sharing the bunk room without a chaperone--”

Chewie grumbled some more, and Rey froze before disgust filled her face. “I did NOT need that mental image, Chewie.”

 _What is it?_ Ben said through the force. You're distressed.

Rey squirmed. The whole force talking thing in each other’s heads would take some getting used to. _Chewie just informed me that you were conceived on the Falcon, in the room where we'll be sleeping, no less. Rey thought back. He intends to sleep on the floor between us to make sure there are no unexpected “force babies”._

Rey could almost feel the lift of Ben's eyebrows through the force. _I see._ He was silent for a moment. _Is motherhood something you desire?_ His thoughts were husky, and Rey trembled, feeling more exposed than she had in her entire life. Chewie continued his lecture at her, but she was too flustered to process anything he said.

She opened the cockpit door despite Chewie's protests and half-stumbled out of there. Her whole body felt warm and loose, yet somehow electrified, and she wondered for a moment if she were drugged.

She started heading for the bunks, but on recalling that Ben was likely there, she headed for the cargo bay where the porgs had been stashed after the Resistance took control of the ship.

The strange birds were everywhere, but Rey cleared a spot and collapsed into a huddle, sobbing from the intensity of what she had felt when Ben asked her if she wanted children. It was a question she had never dreamed of considering before.

She knew now that she had been abandoned by her own parents, and her whole life before the last few weeks had been a routine of survival with no attachments beyond those of utility. And while these last few weeks were different, she spent so much time dodging death, several times at the end of Ben's blade, that the idea of a family of her own or even any kind of joyful future never crossed her mind. All she had ever hoped for were to survive until her parents found her, and now she didn’t even have that.

What did she want? She wanted her friends to be happy and safe. She wanted to protect the ideas of the Resistance, yet she also wanted to protect the people who would suffer without the steadiness provided by the Order, and she wanted Ben to…

The cargo door opened, and there he was. “What's wrong?” Ben asked, closing the gap between them until he was crouching on the floor in front of her, disturbing several porgs in the process. His normally steady face was wrought with concern. She stared at him blankly. He held up a hand and Rey felt the start of a mind probe.

“Stop that,” she said even as she blocked his probe. “It's rude.”

Ben growled as he spoke, “What's wrong?!”

Rey stared at him with narrowed eyes. “Well I'm not going to tell you while you're glaring at me like that.” She didn’t dare tell him how disturbed his question had made her or the direction her own thoughts of him had been taking lately.

Rey felt Ben's anger flare and the mind probe renew with strength, but she blocked it again and slapped him in one move. “No. You don't get to decide when I tell you things, and you don't get to force it out of me when you don't get your way.”

Ben snapped. “How am I supposed to help you if I don't know what's wrong!?” Several porgs chose that moment to roar at Rey alongside Ben in a clear imitation of him. Ben raised his arm to backhand them, but Rey grabbed his hand and pulled it between her own.

“They're harmless creatures, Ben. You don't need to take your anger out on them.”

“Then what? What do I do?” he asked her, his face crumpling with the tenderness of her hands on his.

Rey felt a dizzying wave of something unfamiliar hit her as she stared into his eyes. She found herself pulling him to her as she carefully leaned her forehead on his chest. The force pulsed with the moment, and they both gasped, clutching each other tightly as a vision came to them. As it passed, Ben wrapped his arms around her tightly and whispered into her ear. “Did you see it too?”

“Us. Together,” she said. Her cheeks burning red. They had been kissing in the vision, and her belly had been swollen with pregnancy. She wondered if it was his in the same moment that she knew it couldn’t be anyone else’s. “What did you see?”

“Us. Together,” he echoed. After a moment, he nuzzled her ear and added, “As were our lips.” Rey’s strength fled her at the knowledge that he had seen the same vision. Ben lifted her face up and caressed it. “We will be powerful together,” he said in a thoughtful tone.

Rey’s senses returned to her and she pushed against his chest to create space between them. “It was just a kiss, Ben,” she said, hoping he hadn’t noticed the pregnancy in the vision and trying to play down what she felt, but her shaking voice betrayed her emotions.

“You will be by my side,” he said with a new certainty.

“Perhaps, but I am not yours yet,” Rey reminded him.

“You will be,” Ben said and gazed at her. He brushed her bottom lip with his thumb and leaned in again, but she turned her head to block her lips, leaving him facing her ear once more. “Why fight it, Rey?” he whispered.

“Because I don't trust you yet, nor do you trust me. Half the time we’ve met we’ve tried to kill each other, and while we seem to be past that, we’re still on opposite sides of a war, Ben! What would you do if I were on a ship you were ordered to destroy? Betray the Order?”

“Yes,” he said with full confidence and without hesitation. Rey scoffed in skepticism. “You doubt me, but I've done it before. I did not shoot my mother when ordered to, though she has been far less kind to me than you have.” He kissed her forehead gently, and Rey shuddered and felt her whole body heat up in response. “I want you, Rey.”

“And you take what you want,” Rey said, recalling one of their earliest conversations. She tried to find fighting words to stop him, but the lure of that vision and his own straightforward admission had left her heady with thoughts of his lips. “I won’t let you force me,” she said even as she leaned closer to him.

“I won’t need to. I feel your desire. You want this too.” Ben trailed a finger along the back of her neck, and she gasped at the sensation, her thoughts growing cloudy. “If you don’t want me, you should stop before you lose yourself.” He brushed noses with her, letting his lips hover a breath from her own. Rey let out a small hungry moan.

“I might be okay with losing myself,” Rey admitted. She felt Ben’s desire surge to match her own as she reached up to caress his jawline. Ben’s eyes fluttered shut at her touch and then shot open again to meet her own with a fierce intensity.

Kiss me? Ben asked through the force. He was perfectly still now outside his deep breathing, and Rey realized he was waiting on her to take the first step to change things between them. It was her choice to make. He would not take that from her.

Rey’s heart felt like it would burst, but she did not close the gap, nor did she try to push him away again.

They were still frozen like that when the door slammed open and Chewie roared at them. Rey all but fell out of Ben’s lap trying to get away. Ben gazed quietly at Rey as he stood up carefully. She blushed, knowing how clumsy and confused she must seem.

Chewie grumbled at them, and Ben finally faced Chewie. “Thanks, Chewie. I knew there would be TIE fighters when we exited hyperspace. They'll leave us alone once I provide the proper codes,” Ben said and jogged off after Chewie to the cockpit.

Rey collapsed back on the floor, sending porgs scurrying away. The news had cleared her head and reminded her that Ben was with the First Order, her enemy, no matter how much she might want him. “I almost kissed him! He's still the enemy, Rey. You can’t go around kissing your enemy, even if the force suggests it. Finn was right. I've gone mad!”


	8. Chapter 8

Kylo Ren sighed in relief as the five TIE fighters facing the Falcon moved to escort positions following communications. They had a long flight yet. The weapons production was in the center of a system too volatile for hyper speeds. He was thankful they would not have to fight their way in.

“We’re all set, Chewbacca.”

Chewie fussed at Kylo for putting them in this mess as he stepped away from the communications transmitter. 

Kylo froze. He had not meant to be alone with Chewie at any point. It felt too much like being alone with his father. And though Kylo was not sorry that Han was dead, Kylo was sorry it had been at his hand. Not that Kylo had had any choice; Snoke had been in his head when it happened.

Chewie would never believe that though. Kylo doubted even Rey would believe him even though she saw Snoke monitored his every thought, even their force connections and visions. The truth was a secret to take to his grave. 

Chewie spoke again. “Yes, everything is settled now. It's an overnight journey from this point.”

There was silence as Kylo stood by the door and Chewie remained at the helm. Kylo thought Chewie might interrogate him on his relationship with Rey, especially since Chewie had seen them a hair from kissing, but Chewie hadn't said a word about it.

Kylo pressed the door panel to leave, but didn't move, and it soon zoomed shut again. “Chewie,” Kylo said after a moment. Chewie turned to face him with a wary look. Kylo gazed at him. He had once called Chewie his uncle to the laughter of his peers. Chewie had taught him to shoot and read him bedtime stories when his parents were too busy for him. Chewie had listened to his fears when his parents had fought and when the dark whispers first started. Chewie had also flown him to Luke's academy and left despite Ben's pleading for him to stay. Rey's parents had abandoned her the same way, Kylo had fatally abandoned Han, and Rey had abandoned Kylo following Snoke’s death.

Ben's eyes watered as he recalled how many times he had dreamed that Chewie would come back to collect him. Later, after the whispers took hold, Kylo had fantasized how he would take revenge on Chewie for abandoning him. However, he had never dreamed Chewie would see him kill Han, which was a far crueler revenge than his idle fantasies had imagined. Yet, Chewie had welcomed him aboard all the same… well, after Chewie knew Kylo wasn’t attacking them. 

Kylo Ren took a deep breath. Perhaps it was time to let the past die in a new way. “Chewie, I'm sorry,” he said, and he left the cockpit before he could see Chewie's reaction or second-guess his own decision to apologize.

Kylo checked the force for Rey's location and found her in the lounge. She had the holo-game on and was ordering the pieces to brutally attack each other. “Would you like an opponent?” he asked.

Rey kept her eyes on the board. “I would rather a friend.” She was tense and moody, and he wondered if he pushed too far earlier. He had left the final choice to her, but not without trying to influence her.

“Only a friend?” Kylo asked, hoping she would clarify.

Rey froze, still refusing to look at him. She took several deep breaths, as if working up her courage. “I told Finn what happened after Snoke died… about your offer to rule with you. He said it sounded like a marriage proposal.”

Kylo sat next to her, but with some space between them. “And?”

“Was it?” she asked, looking at him. 

Kylo watched the figures of the game thoughtfully. “Perhaps. I hadn't dared think of what a future would be like while Snoke lived to monitor my thoughts. I failed to conceal that I wanted you with me. I didn’t dare think past that. It's why he was determined to destroy you, you know. He saw what I saw when we joined hands. He knew I would choose you in the future. Strange that that very vision sealed his own fate. I don't know that I would have killed him then were your own life not in danger from him.”

Rey looked at him with narrowed eyes. “You killed Snoke for yourself.”

“Perhaps. Like I said, I wasn't allowed the luxury of private introspection, so I can’t say for certain. It is strange now, knowing I can think freely again. I'm not used to it.”

Rey frowned, looking away. Kylo realized he must have missed something important. “You fear something. What is it?”

“Poe told me about your interrogation of him. He said he had been tortured first by your men and then had his mind invaded with no mercy or courtesy by you.”

Kylo Ren waited. He suspected he knew where she was going with this. He had struggled many times not to explore why he treated her so differently while Snoke still monitored his mind. His interest in her had inspired several of his seemingly random destructive tantrums as he sought to protect his thoughts from Snoke.

“When you found me, you were not… kind. You were terrifying, but you also… I remember falling into your arms. Han had seen you carry me into your ship yourself. You were watching me when I came to.”

“I didn't dare let you out of my sight,” Kylo said. “You wonder why. I told Snoke that it was because you possessed the map that I dared not risk trusting you to another, especially after the betrayal of FN-2187.”

Rey frowned. “Except you could have pulled the information from my head at any time. You didn't even need to bring me on board. You certainly didn't have to wait until I was conscious.”

Kylo flexed his fingers in the air to manage the irritation flowing through him as he thought of how to explain how ridiculous her suggestion was. “I did have to bring you on board. The Resistance had arrived.” He took a deep breath, willing calm to flow through him. “As for my waiting until you woke, you already know how strongly I feel about being attacked while asleep.”

Rey blushed and looked down. Kylo assumed she felt embarrassed that she had forgotten that he was asleep when Luke meant to attack him. He took slow breaths to calm himself down in the silence, wishing he had better control of himself around her.

“You tried to be kind though, when you didn’t have to be. It was so strange. You saw my desire to kill you, and you tried to calm me even believing there was no way for me to defend myself, let alone hurt you. You told me not to be afraid. I was too horrified to process it then, but looking back, I can't make sense of why you bothered. I was your enemy.”

Kylo shuddered as he recalled his thoughts from when they first met that he had tried so hard to suppress since. “You were familiar somehow. Important to me even though you were a stranger. Perhaps the force was guiding me even then.”

Rey buried her face in her knees. “So all of this… connection between us, your desire to teach me and be with me, it's all because you're listening to the force?” Her voice was so quiet that Kylo Ren had to lean closer to hear her.

Ah, so that’s what scared her. Kylo Ren exhaled in relief. He could reassure her on this point, at least. “The force revealed that you were worth paying attention to. You showed me how amazing you are.” 

He held out a hand for her to hold, and she cautiously took it. Her skin was rough and coarse against his own, and he grieved the reminder of her rough past. The life of a destitute scavenger on a desert planet would not be kind to one’s skin. “I discovered your brilliance while I searched for the map to Skywalker. Most little girls abandoned to scavenge would have died or resorted to more demeaning opportunities, but you learned the profession and how to defend yourself with no guardians or friends, clinging to the hope your parents would find you. You already had my admiration then. You faced me fiercely, succeeded in hiding Luke from me, and successfully fought me in the woods with no one to train you.”

“You admire my strength,” Rey said cautiously.

“Yes, but I admire your heart more. Rey, my existence was a mistake that my parents grew to fear. Luke tried to kill me. Snoke did control me. Even my knights kept their distance. You are the only person who has seen and accepted me for me.”

Rey shook her head. “No. I tried to kill you on multiple occasions, and then I tried to recruit you to the Resistance and the light side so they would have a Jedi to give them hope.”

Kylo nodded, acknowledging her point. “You did try to kill me. On Takodana, Starkiller Base, and then again in our first force connection, though neither of us knew what was happening at the time. Still, you recognized both the monster and the light in me, and you did not look away. You saw all of me and reached out your hand when no one else would have.”

He looked down at where his hand held hers on the bench. He had thought she was gone forever when she left following Snoke’s death, and yet here she was at his side again. “I have wondered, Rey, why you grabbed the lightsaber instead of telling me you would not stay.”

“After Snoke’s death?” Rey frowned. “I did not think you would allow me to leave without a fight.”

Kylo Ren considered this. He had not known then that their connection would continue past Snoke’s death. In the moment, it felt like he would lose her forever if she went back to the Resistance. “You were probably correct. I was desperate, and you were my only hope.” The recording Artoo had shown him of his mother saying something similar popped into his mind, and he shook his head briefly to clear it. He thought a moment on what life would have been like if he forced Rey to stay against her will and shuddered, suddenly thankful that she had escaped.

“And now? Will I have to fight my way free of you again?” Rey asked. She was studying their joined hands too, as if they were as strange and miraculous to her as they were to him. He rubbed his thumb in circles on her palm, and she blushed.

“No. I know we will find each other again. After all, the force connection still exists between us.” His breath stuttered as he considered how his answer might be different without the connection. No matter. They were connected, and, more importantly, she sought him out as well. “At the time of Snoke's death, neither of us knew what would happen to our connection.”

He smiled, thankful beyond words that their future together remained. “And you, Rey, you feel drawn to me, though I am a monster. Why?”

Rey smirked and leaned against him, knowing he was quoting her own accusation against him. He switched which hand held hers and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. He was amazed time and again how right it felt to touch her. Even when they first met, she had felt so right in his arms that he didn’t even consider asking someone else to carry her. 

Rey took a deep breath and exhaled slowly before speaking. “I don't know that I would have been different, knowing what you went through. I am far from perfect already, and even Luke turned out to be fallible. I suspect now that we all are part monster. I don't think I could go through life holding everyone's pasts against them.”

“And the future? I will continue trying to destroy the Resistance, you know.”

Rey pulled away and turned to face him with shock on her face. “Ben, no…”

Kylo sighed. “We remain at war, Rey. What do you expect?”

Rey tossed her hand free, stood up, and spun around, brimming with frustration. “Something! The Resistance and the Order are at war, but not you and me, nor you and your mother… and once you get back in charge of things, there's no reason we can't find some way to work things out. I mean if you're in charge of the Order, can't you simply change things to make them better?”

Kylo's anger rose to match Rey's as he stood before her. “It's not that simple, Rey!” 

“You're the Supreme Leader, aren't you? Make it that simple!”

They glared at each other, the ferocity of their emotions matched. They heard Chewie's footsteps coming towards them and turned away in the same moment.

Chewie entered the room with three plates of some strange goop balanced on his arms. He mewled at them and set the plates down at a table.

Kylo and Rey eyed the food with disgust. Even Chewie stared apprehensively at the food on his fork before taking a tentative bite and grimacing. “Ben, at least tell me you can get us better food on the Falcon,” Rey said. 

Kylo Ren nodded. “That is something within my power.”


	9. Chapter 9

They all decided to forego the meal in favor of Ben negotiating better meal options with their First Order escort. Chewie fed their leftovers to the porgs while Rey practiced her stances in the lounge alone. 

The exercise helped clear her thoughts. There were three conflicts before her, as she saw it: Ben's recovery in political power, her own training, and her relationship with Ben.

She did not doubt that she should help Ben usurp his usurper. She had heard enough of Hux to know she preferred Ben in charge even without her personal connection to Ben. Really, it wasn't much of a conflict at all, except that the Resistance might come to doubt her more if they saw her helping Ben. Still, it was the best choice for all involved, especially if she could use her role to bridge negotiations between the Order and the Resistance.

Rey stepped into a position she normally did with her staff and stopped, her attention disrupted by the lack of the familiar weight. This wasn't working. She glanced around the room for potential substitutes and spied an old abandoned mop. Rey freed the long wooden handle from the mop head and tested it. It was lighter and more wobbly than her staff, but it was better than nothing.

She returned to her stances, now using the familiar poses from her life on Jakku while she evaluated her training. 

Without Luke, she had no guidance in the Jedi ways except from those who had abandoned them. Ben had offered to teach her, but allowing him to teach her also meant spending even more time with him, and dedicating time to him after he returned to power… How would that work if the Order and Resistance were still at war? She knew he would not try to harm her, but that didn't mean he wouldn't use her to harm others.

Which was the whole reason she was currently outcast, so maybe that didn't matter as much now. If the Resistance wouldn't use her anyway, there was no reason not to learn from Ben. He had been willing to teach her governance and politics too, though there might be no point… unless she ended up at Ben's side leading the First Order.

With that thought she lost control and slammed the makeshift staff into the holo game table. The staff broke so that it held together only by a stubborn thin strip of wood. 

Rey exhaled slowly. She had broken her makeshift staff, but she could fix i. “Tape,” she said and went searching for some. 

That left the third issue, which was her relationship with Ben. Her face burned with the realization that she was very much attracted to him and had been so for some time. Had she always wanted him underneath the fear she had felt? She found a tape dispenser and pulled a strip free so roughly that she scraped her knuckles on the metal teeth. She cursed quietly as she quickly wrapped the broken mop handle back together before sucking on her now-bleeding fingers.

Her relationship with Ben had already been growing before the visions, but the knowledge of what would come influenced them both. They both saw that in the future they would stand together and trust each other with a solidarity Rey had never felt with anyone else. Rey had known in that moment that he was worth gambling her life on, and she had, with the result that Snoke was dead and the war still came between her and Ben.

Rey dug out a clean bandage and bound her bleeding hand. She stood back up and tested the repaired handle. It was no longer straight, and it wobbled when moved. She sighed. Maybe the future wasn't worth fighting anymore. That second vision had very clearly shown that she and Ben would become very intimate at some point.

Yet they were still at war with each other, and Rey would never forgive herself if she gave up her values, even if the force demanded it. She was Rey before she was a jedi, she was Rey before she was a Resistance fighter, and she was Rey before she was Ben's… whatever-she-was. She was Rey first.

The resolution healed something inside her she hadn’t even realized was damaged, and the force filled her as Rey felt truly at peace with herself and the universe around her. She even half-imagined a ghostly Luke grinning proudly at her and smiled sadly at her wild imagination. She knew Luke was gone.

Ben returned to the lounge carrying a box overflowing with fresh vegetables and fruits. “You should find this more appetizing,” he said, setting the box down on the holo table before turning to fully look at her. “What happened to your hand?” he asked.

Rey ignored his question as she rushed to the box and gazed at the assortment of things inside. “They're safe to eat?” She had never seen such things in her life. Ben wordlessly eyed her and handed her a red, mostly spherical fruit, and she greedily bit into it after glancing at him. It was sweet, juicy, and crisp.

“It's called an apple. I had forgotten you were originally my scavenger. What did they feed you on Jakku?”

Rey devoured both the apple he gave her and a second one from the box before answering. “Instant bread rations. Little packets of powder. Pour a little water on them and they puff up into bread rolls. Dry, nasty things, but they kept me alive.”

Ben’s eyebrows shot up, and he hurriedly placed several other food items in front of Rey. “These are meant to be eaten without cooking. I’ve been in your mind. I know what rations you speak of. That was not bread. I'll be back.”

Rey barely heard him as she ate, as hungry for the new flavors and sensations as for the sustenance. A half minute later, Ben was back with what looked like a larger, more golden, and a thousand-times-more-delicious-smelling version of the bread she knew. Rey swallowed what was in her mouth and gazed at the loaf in his hands.

“This is proper bread,” Ben said and tore a piece free. He held it before her mouth and gazed at her lips. “Take a bite,” he whispered, his voice drenched in huskyness. Rey’s eyes shot open. Did he mean for her to eat it from his hands? Was that a thing people did? Rey had lost focus of the force while eating, but she reached back into the force now to calm herself. Instead of calm, however, she got hit with a wave of Ben’s desire for her and slammed shut her force awareness in a panic.

“That's a nice spread of food you've got here,” said Luke.

Rey watched Ben start and fling the piece of bread towards the voice, only to watch it pass through Luke's force ghost. She whimpered. Ghosts were not supposed to be real.

“Ben, don't waste the good things in life. They're far and few enough already. Hi there, Rey. Seemed like you needed some help breaking the tension, so I popped in. Say, you’re not looking too good...”

“Get. OUT!” Ben roared. Rey reached through the force to check Luke out and felt Ben do the same. Luke's presence had a concentration of the Force at it, but nothing they could interact with using their own powers. 

“I'll leave when the lady asks me to, Ben. Honestly, I’m relieved you seem to genuinely like her. It says you have good taste and may have hope yet, but you have to take these things slowly,” Luke said. “You were so forward you were frightening her. Ooh, there's milk here! Shame I can't drink anymore.”

Ben closed his eyes tightly and covered his face, as if in pain. 

“You're getting better at managing that temper, Ben. I might be proud of you yet.”

“I don't need your good opinion,” Ben said, glaring at his teacher. “If you weren't already dead, I would kill you now. I regret missing the opportunity.”

Luke smiled broadly at this, waited a moment, and said, “Call me Uncle.” 

Ben glowered at him.

“This is a thing? Force ghosts?” Rey asked in a squeaky voice.

Ben sighed, as if resigning himself to dealing with Luke’s company for Rey’s benefit. “They're a thing, though Luke’s unusually annoying, just like when he was alive. I saw the ghosts of Yoda and Ben Kenobi a few times when this demon was teaching me. Never my grandfather though.”

Luke's face became somber. “Anakin was exhausted after his time as Darth Vader, and he did not have guidance for us, given how much of his own life went astray. I feared I would not come back either, after what I had done to you, Ben, and my cowardly choices after. You know, I apologized to Ben, but I'm not sure I ever thanked you, Rey, for not giving up on the Jedi dream. Thank you. You saved me.”

“You're welcome,” Rey said, in a shaky voice. She was still adjusting to the idea that she was speaking to a ghost.

“Luke, you need to go. You're the one scaring her now,” Ben said.

Luke made a show of studying Rey. “Yea, I think you may be right. Well, since you are with her, Ben, I must ask you take good care of her. And Rey, if you ever need me, just call for me. I know some great embarrassing stories about Ben.”

Luke winked out from existence, and Rey started hyperventilating. “I just saw a ghost.”

Ben massaged his temple and slowly nodded. “Yes, yes, you did.”

“And it was of Luke!” Rey exclaimed.

Ben gave her a sideways glance. “Is this really that strange after everything else you've seen and done with the force?”

"Yes!”

Ben rolled his eyes, but there was no malice to it. “Come here,” he said, and opened his arms to her.

“What!?”

“You're panicking. I'll hold you until you calm down. My mother used to do it for me when I was little. It helps.” Rey hesitated, but when she checked the force, Ben's mood was calm with a touch of concern for her. The intense desire that had consumed him earlier was gone.

“Okay,” she said, and she carefully stood up on shaky legs, climbed into his large lap, and rested her head against his chest. He carefully folded his arms in around her, holding her securely to him, and leaned his own head on hers. She could hear his steady heartbeat, and her own steadily slowed to match it.

“Ben? I'm sorry,” she said after her trembling became an occasional shudder instead of a constant thing.

“What for?”

“Summoning Luke. I was scared, and I did want help, but I didn't mean to invite someone who…” she couldn't find the words.

Ben sighed deeply. “It's okay, Rey, and I owe you an apology too--for scaring you.” He cleared his throat. “You know our emotions fuel our connection to the force. Your pleasure at trying new tastes was… very loud. I had not anticipated my reaction.”

Rey blushed and nodded against him. 

“Your heart rate has calmed. It would be good if you returned to your own seat now, Rey.” 

Rey was reluctant to move. She had been enjoying the safe intimacy of his embrace. “Why?” she asked, snuggling closer and closing her eyes on instinct.

“Because I do not want to scare you again with my desire,” he said simply. 

Rey's eyes shot open, and she scrambled off of him, collapsing on the floor. Ben stood and helped her up, smiling gently when she didn't immediately let go of his hand. He kissed it carefully and released it.

“I better go help Chewie cook the meat. Enjoy the food. There's more where that came from.”


	10. Chapter 10

Kylo Ren had not expected to enjoy cooking dinner with Chewie, but he had. They seemed to have a comfortable silence between them, and though Chewie was uncharacteristically quiet, he had given Kylo a fierce hug before bringing out the dinner plates, which were heaped with roasted meats and vegetables this time.

During dinner, they seemed to all be lost in their thoughts as well, which suited Kylo fine. He had enjoyed his time courting Rey, but the First Order needed his attention as well, and the news he received of Hux’s doings were nearly as disturbing as the local First Order’s food offerings were generous.

Unless Hux were dumb enough to attack him directly, he would need to organize the knights and plan for battle. The personnel loss necessary to restore his leadership could become significant depending on how many troops actually supported Hux’s mutiny. Then again, it was possible the people involved could be reconditioned instead. He did not like to waste good soldiers.

He wondered what Rey would make of his dilemma. Which was worse? To destroy life or destroy freedom? Of course, he knew his own feelings. Death was final. Enslavement was not. He had faced that choice everyday he lived under Snoke, and now he was free. He wondered if a day would ever come that he could downsize the stormtrooper units to volunteer-only units, as they had in the past. Then all those who wished to could move on and become farmers or teachers or fathers if they wanted. He expected Rey would like that.

 _What is it? You're staring at me._ Rey asked in his mind. Kylo smiled and sent his memory of their shared vision to her, with an emphasis on his glow at her pregnancy. Rey’s silverware clashed to the table and she turned very red. Kylo bit his lip to avoid snickering. He had been waiting for the right moment to mention the pregnancy in the vision, but this seemed as good a time as any.

Chewie looked back and forth between them and shook his head, as if absolving himself of any role in their drama. He then excused himself and left. A memory of Chewie doing the same during a dinner with his parents came to mind, and Kylo smiled. It had been a happy evening, one of the few where his parents’ love for each other overwhelmed all the fears and differences between them. He wished it had happened more often.

 _I'm not asking this time._ Rey said in his head. He glanced at Rey, and she darted her eyes back to her plate.

 _Feeling shy?_ He asked her. She kicked his shin the next moment, and he chuckled. It wasn't the first or second time he had laughed today, and it felt strange, but good. He had been too terrified to feel joy while both Luke and Snoke lived. Would his future with Rey be like this? Easy smiles and teasing each other over dinner? He refused to repeat the failures of his father’s neglect.

Of course, if his present situation was any indicator, it was his work that would end up neglected. Further flirting with Rey could wait at least until he arranged things with the First Order. “Excuse me,” he said after quickly clearing his plate.

He went to the cockpit where his notes were. It was strange using paper and pen, but paper and pen was all Chewie could find when Kylo asked earlier. The local First Order bases had been very helpful in supplying information on the movement of Hux’s forces. Much of the First Order believed they would fall apart without a strong force user at its helm, and many others simply didn’t like Hux. While Kylo Ren had a reputation for ruthlessness, he was not known to be cruel.

Kylo was thoughtfully thumbing the page of notes when the radio came to life. “Millenium Falcon, this is TIE fighter T14-02. You have incoming from Angry Bandit, captained by Knight of Ren member Marx Junko. He insists that he needs personal proof that Kylo Ren is on board the Millenium Falcon to withdraw his attack. Please advise.”

Kylo pressed his lips in a straight line. Marx was the most likeable of his knights, but he always had been a pain in the ass. Kylo closed his eyes and reached into the force for Marx and his ship. There. He held his hand out as if holding an invisible object, then rotated his wrist quickly, as if flinging it into a spin.

The Falcon's radio exploded in alien cursing. Kylo smirked, grabbed the air, and set it straight again.

“Kylo Ren, you crazy bastard! What on earth landed you back on the Millenium Falcon? I thought you wouldn’t be caught dead in that ship again,” Marx asked over the radio. Kylo Ren had given up on schooling Marx in formalities ages ago, which was just as well. Marx was the closest thing Kylo had to a friend within the knights.

Kylo Ren sat down in the copilot chair and activated the microphone. “An unexpected turn of events. The Falcon was simply in the right place at the right time. I’m surprised you left the school.” Marx, despite being incredibly childish himself, had volunteered to take over the training and management of the force-sensitive children they found in the First Order.

“Wan has them now. She wanted to come too though.” Wan Tiebolt was another knight of Ren who had made an unlikely pairing with Marx. They were both humanoid aliens, but Wan looked like a walking praying mantis and rarely got excited, whereas Marx was some squat avian variety who rarely was calm. “I heard the gist of it. Gossip travels fast, you know. So Hux tried to do you in? I'm surprised he had the guts or the wit to pull off a proper attempt.”

“He set our ship on a locked course directly at a sun and removed all personnel, escape pods, and ships while I slept. The heat woke me.”

Marx whistled. “Then I'm surprised you're alive. How did you escape?”

“The force,” Kylo said simply.

“Super-specific there. The force. Like that couldn't mean a thousand things. Oh yea, speaking of rumors, there's some rumor going around that you and some new Jedi girl have a force connection that lets you interact no matter the distance. Actually started Resistance-side too. Dunno if you want to try clearing things up or wha--”

“It's true,” Kylo said. “She's on the ship. You'll meet her soon.”

“Oh, you captured her? Congratulations, Kylo--”

“No, I'm here as her guest.”

The radio was silent. Kylo Ren narrowed his eyes.

“Umm, Kylo Ren? My most excellent Supreme Leader and master?”

Kylo growled. “What is it?” An obsequious Marx was never a good sign.

“I don't mean to question your judgment, but is it wise to bring the Jedi of the Resistance into the heart of the First Order at this time?”

Kylo Ren sighed. He knew he would have this conversation repeated with every Knight of Ren. If he were in Marx’s place, he would have thought himself mad. “Rey supports my position of Supreme Leader and is accompanying me to help me seize it. The Resistance has estranged her since learning of her bond with me. She will not be telling them our secrets.”

“But Kylo--”

“She is the future mother of my child, Marx. I will have her at my side.”

Another minute of radio silence, then a panicked, “Congratulations! I didn't even know you've had time to… well, not that it takes long, but still.. I thought the human reproductive system took… Anyway, my sincerest congratulations. I will personally see to it that your lady feels most welcome by the First Order. Look at the time! I gotta run. Signing off!”

Kylo Ren gaped at the radio. He hadn't meant to suggest that Rey was already pregnant. They hadn't even kissed. His heart skipped a beat as the force shifted around him, forming a connection to Rey, and Rey shrieked.

“If you turn around, I will throw you off this ship,” Rey threatened.

Kylo Ren sighed and covered his eyes with his arm so she wouldn't try to kill him if she ever realized her nude reflection had been perfectly visible on the glass of the cockpit. “You're undressed.”

“I'm in the shower. Can't we talk later?”

Ben sighed. He had not meant to create this connection, but if she was there anyway, he may as well brief her. “I caused a misunderstanding. I would like your thoughts on it.”

“Can it wait five minutes?”

Kylo Ren closed the connection and pondered the implications of what happened. Introducing Rey as the future mother of his child would significantly reduce the obstacles for her acceptance by the First Order, but it could endanger her already fragile ties to the Resistance.

It was strange to realize he cared about such a thing, but he cared because she cared.

A few minutes later, Rey entered the cockpit wearing a loose sleep shirt that looked big enough to fit Chewbacca. “It is Chewie's,” Rey confirmed. “A friend of theirs bought it as a gag gift when he was younger. I think a guy named Lando?”

Kylo shrugged. He knew Lando had been one of his dad’s friends, but hadn't met the guy. Still, he wanted to thank Lando now. The shirt stopped just below Rey's knees, so he was able to see her legs and feet for the first time. Furthermore, though she kept her arms crossed tightly over her breasts, her hips were made very evident by the drape of the cloth.

“Stop looking at me like that. I wanted to wash my clothes, and it was the only backup option onboard. You wanted to speak with me. Start talking or I'll leave.”

Kylo Ren forced his eyes to meet hers. “I spoke to one of my knights, a guy named Marx Junko. I tried explaining our situation, referred to you as the future mother of my child, and he congratulated me and ran off to prepare things for us.”

Rey blinked as she registered what Kylo Ren hadn’t spelled out. “He thinks I'm pregnant,” Rey said. She sank into the closest passenger chair as if about to faint, but then her anger exploded into the force. “You didn't correct him?!”

“He signed off before I recovered from my own shock,” Kylo Ren admitted, though he was too mesmerized by the anger pouring off of Rey to be upset. She was so powerful, and she hadn't even tapped her full potential yet.

Rey's fury tripled in force. She stood, grabbed the neck of his shirt, and pulled him so close that her angry breaths felt like feathers dusting his collarbone. “So you're telling me that the great Supreme Leader of the New Order, the grandson of Darth Vader, the son of the two most famous generals in the Rebellion and Resistance, the nephew of Luke Skywalker, and the master of the Knights of Ren was too tongue-tied to correct his own subordinate after implying that a girl he's not even kissed yet is pregnant with his child!?”

She was beautiful and magnificent in her rage, and it took every ounce of his willpower not to kiss her then and there. “I want you so badly,” he said hoarsely, no longer able to focus on anything beyond restraining his desire to close the narrow gap between their lips.

A different kind of fire lit in her eyes until the force felt like a molten flame between them. She let go of him and stepped away, her modesty forgotten as she stood up straight in the thin nightgown and gazed down at him. “I know,” she said and left the cockpit.


	11. Chapter 11

Rey stumbled away from the cockpit, dismissing Chewie's inquiry of concern when she passed him by the cargo bay with a porg on his shoulder, and somehow found herself collapsed in her bunk. 

Being close to Ben was dangerous--very dangerous. She had to be more careful. She had felt his passion rise to match her own immense anger, and the fact that he held himself back despite the intensity of it left her breathless. Though she had always restrained herself, it had never been with such need behind it. It would be too much to fall into that passion while they were at war though. For multiple reasons, she realized, pressing a hand to her womb.

And what to do about the misunderstanding that was likely already spreading throughout the First Order? Could it even be stopped at this point? The news of their force connection had traveled fast once released. There was no reason to believe this would be any different.

She needed to talk to someone. She wished it could be General Organa, but that wasn't an option.

“Luke?” Rey whispered, feeling like a complete idiot. “Are you there?”

“Am I anywhere?” a whisper returned, and he was standing next to her. He glanced around, as if surprised. “Ben’s not here this time? Shame, I had fun teasing him.”

Rey scrunched up her face, but decided to stay on focus. “I wanted some advice. Ben accidentally started a rumor that I'm pregnant with his child.” 

Luke jumped back, as if startled badly, then leaned close to look at her womb. “It's definitely a rumor, if that's what you're wondering. Jedi ghosts: Advisors, cockblockers, and pregnancy tests wrapped up in one! Course, it should be easy enough for you to check for yourself. Just check for an extra life force there whenever you're concerned. I could see Ben’s life force easily from the start. Startled Leia pretty badly with the news. Though if you don’t want one, just don’t have… wait, you do know how babies are made, right?”

Rey gave him a look so cold he faked blowing into his hands and rubbing them together to keep them warm. “Chilly! So there's a rumor. Can't stop those. Just have to accept that some people will believe it. What's the issue?”

Rey threw her hands up in frustration. “How do I talk to people when they think I'm pregnant with the Supreme Leader of the First Order's child?”

Luke's eyebrows rose into his forehead. “Oh! That's easy. If they're someone you care about, you tell them the truth, and if not, don't waste your energy.”

“It can't be that simple!” Rey exclaimed. “What if I don't get the chance to explain myself?”

“Then you don't get the chance to explain yourself. May as well make peace with it. People will misunderstand you. It's not something you can control.”

Rey groaned and covered her face.

“Although, you're a Jedi, rumored to carry the child of my nephew, who is powerful himself. Have you or Ben considered that there are some who will try badly to kill you rather than risk another force user be born, especially one with your combined bloodlines who would be positioned to destroy either legacy?”

“But I'm not pregnant!” Rey protested.

“But they don't know that.”

Rey growled her frustration and punched her pillow. “It's not fair!”

Luke tsked at her. “Temper, temper. My teachers would have told me that such rage was unbecoming of a Jedi, but I think it suits you. Still, you and Ben will need to be careful. Leia, though she's not very strong in the force and Han had no powers at all, was under constant assassination attempts during her pregnancy, even from some Resistance members who feared her son might follow Darth Vader’s legacy.” Luke cocked his head to the side and gave Rey an amused glance. “Well, they weren't wrong.”

“So I'm going to be attacked by people I don't know for something I haven't done?”

Luke nodded. “Yup.”

“That's ridiculous!”

“Ridiculous, yes, and little different from your current life. You're the Jedi of the Resistance. The First Order has already targeted you. There are already others opposed to a return of the Jedi. The only thing that's changed is that, since Kylo Ren is the rumored father, you will have unexpected allies and enemies on both sides.”

Rey took several deep breaths and eventually acknowledged that this was true. She felt a hollow grief that her peaceful days were gone. “I never thought I might miss scavenging on Jakku.”

“I never thought I would miss farming on Tatooine… or Uncle Owen's lectures. It's part of the Jedi legacy, Rey. If you're very lucky, you'll live long enough to isolate yourself in a hidden location for wayward young force users to seek you out before you tell them they're not worth teaching. Make sure to leave some clues before you disappear though. Hidden maps, that sort of thing. Otherwise I might have to tell them your location myself, and I won't do it without sharing embarrassing stories.”

Rey looked at Luke suspiciously. She had always wondered why there was a secret map to him in the first place. “Thanks. I'll keep that in mind.”

“May the force be with you,” Luke said, and he was gone.

Rey took a deep breath and curled up in her bunk. Too much had happened in the last day, and she needed her rest.


	12. Chapter 12

Kylo Ren had tried and failed to reach Marx through traditional channels and had been blocked when he attempted using the force. Chances were half the galaxy believed Rey was carrying his child now. As much as he loved seeing her fire, he hated letting Rey down, and he was afraid to confront her now.

Thankfully, he still had work to do. Chewie came and left several times while he reviewed his notes and reached out to nearby contacts. He and Chewie had some unspoken truce between them now. Yet Kylo wondered what Rey was doing that the wookie sought him out for companionship over her.

Sleeping, he learned, when he finally asked Chewie. That would explain why her force presence was so quiet compared to usual. 

An hour later, he had exhausted his excuses for avoiding her. Sleep had been nudging at him since before dinner, and he suspected, on reflection, that jumping through the force connection to Rey had expended an unusual amount of energy as well. It was time he went to bed too.

He stood up, stretched, and left. He used the dental hygiene pack he had requested alongside the food, showered, dressed except for his shirt to give his back and hair extra time to dry, and quietly entered the bunk cabin. He hated sleeping with a shirt on, but given Rey’s reaction to his chest, he suspected he probably should wear one once he was dry for her sake.

Rey was sleeping. She was whimpering in her dreams, but definitely asleep. Kylo had not intended to disturb her, but on hearing her distress, he paused.

Luke had taught him that invading someone's mind was a violation of privacy and more appropriate to a Sith than a Jedi. Rey seemed to share this perspective despite having done it herself, but when the invasion was done to spare a person of pain, how evil could it be?

Rey's next whimper made up Kylo's mind. He tossed his shirt on, knelt down by Rey's bunk, and stretched his fingers across her head, reaching out through the force.

He entered her dreams.

The bright sun blinded him, and desert heat scorched his skin. “No! Don't go! Don't go!” cried a little girl.

He knew this vision--had seen it the first time he looked into her mind. Rey was a small child, reaching out to the parents who abandoned her with one arm while the other was held back. 

He stared helplessly, not sure what to do with this younger version of Rey, when she looked directly at him and said, “No. You don't belong in this one.”

The landscape changed abruptly. Gone were the sand and the sun. He was now in Snoke's throne room. Snoke was dead. The imperial guard was dead. Only Rey, Kylo Ren, and dream Kylo Ren remained. Kylo Ren stared at her dream-produced image of himself. He was pleading with her to stay, and she was breaking apart, as were the walls of the throne room in her dream.

Kylo stepped up close to Rey, waiting for her to notice his presence as her younger self had, but her eyes were intently on his dream double.

“No, please, no. I don't want to lose this friendship. I don't want to feel lonely again. Please don't make me make this choice, Ben. You're so important to me, please. I don't want to lose you.”

The words echoed all around him in Rey's voice, though her lips did not move, and she did not acknowledge him. He would have to intervene directly. Kylo Ren carefully covered the dream Rey's eyes and wrapped an arm around her.

“You're dreaming, Rey. This memory is the past, and you did not lose me. I'm right here.”

“Ben?” she said, and the throne room melted away. They were in a place unknown to him now… no, not unknown. It was the island from her mind. “I think I'm asleep,” she said.

“You are,” he said.

“You entered my head again,” she said. “I told you to stop doing that.”

“I know. You were crying in your sleep. Would you like me to leave?” 

Rey started to nod, then slowly shook her head. She gestured at the island around her. “This is the island where I was living when the force first connected us.” 

“Where Luke was hiding,” Kylo said, and she nodded. He furrowed his eyes. “But this is the island from your dreams as a child.”

Rey shrugged. “The force works in mysterious ways. After all, look at us.” She started walking around, and Kylo followed. ”I’m not sure I’ve told you. Luke didn't want to train me. He literally threw his lightsaber off a cliff when I offered it to him. Finding it afterward was awful.”

Kylo Ren was surprised. Somehow, he had envisioned Rey being received with open arms by his former master. “Why didn't he want to train you?”

“He thought I was too much like you. Too powerful. Too conflicted. He feared what I would become.”

Kylo Ren nodded. He shouldn't have been surprised, yet she did convince Luke to train her in time. “It was very strange, by the way, finding you with my father and my childhood ship. You fought for my mother and trained under my teacher. You had the life that I threw away.”

“I am a scavenger,” Rey reminded him with a teasing smile. 

Kylo Ren smiled back. He did not resent her for picking up the pieces he had left behind. If anything, he felt relief that she had something at all beyond waiting on Jakku. “What did you want to show me?” Kylo Ren asked.

Rey bit her lip, and Kylo realized she may have been stalling to keep him there. “Are you afraid to be alone?” he asked.

Rey frowned. “Luke once said fear led to the dark side.”

Kylo Ren stepped forward and took her hands in his own. “No, Rey. Fear just means you are human, and you will never be alone again as long as you're by my side. We saw our future, Rey. We belong together.” He slowly knelt down before her and leaned his forehead on her abdomen with a hand on each hip. She trembled under his touch.

“Ben, you know I will have to leave you before that vision takes place,” Rey said. Kylo Ren's hands clenched her own, and he gently pulled her down to face each other while sitting. “You know why.”

“The Resistance,” he voiced, struggling to master his emotions before they encouraged her to push him away. His heart filled with turmoil at the knowledge that they would be apart again. His voice trembled as he said, “I will have you.” He wasn’t sure if it was a promise, a threat, or an attempt to reassure himself.

Rey wrapped her arms loosely around his neck and nestled her head against his. “Someday, but not while we're at war. Those are my limits.”

“I know you want this too, Rey. You intend to punish us both for being at war?” Kylo said as anger won over his grief. He understood that she would return to the Resistance, but delaying their own intimacy just for the war felt pointless and cruel. It would be different if she did it for herself, but for the Resistance? He had been abandoned for that lost cause too many times already. He glared at her with fresh fury. “Or is this to be a barter system where you trade kisses to bargain for the lives of your friends? I would not object.”

He could feel the flush of Rey's skin against his, even though this was still her dream. He had meant the comment to sting and help her reflect on what she was doing. He did not expect her reply.

“You're saying I could prostitute myself to you to end the war?” Rey asked softly, looking at his chest instead of his eyes.

He gripped her chin and forced her to look up at him. “Do you value yourself so little, Rey?” She met his stony gaze with her own. He brushed her bottom lip with his thumb, hoping to spook some sense into her like his overt attentions normally did. Instead, her breath hitched and she parted her lips gently, allowing his thumb to enter just slightly. 

Kylo Ren's own heart raced at the touch of her soft lips. He debated how far to take this. He wanted her badly, but he wanted to keep her. He would not do anything that would inspire resentment, but if this was what she wanted anyway and she needed him to back off of the Resistance to help her be okay with it...

He examined her face, breathless and mesmerized by the touch of her lips. His thumb twitched and he felt the slight hot dampness of her tongue. Lust surged from her for just a moment through the force before she clamped down on her emotions, closed her mouth to his thumb, and gazed at him with heightened color and fright.

She definitely was restraining her desire to do more with him. These would be terms to help her justify being with an enemy to herself, not purchases of an unwilling body. What exchange could he offer that would ease her fears without damaging their relationship or the First Order?

“Rey, I cannot call off the war, but I could aim to disable instead of kill. Stun instead of blast. Capture instead of destroy. It will not help your goals beyond allowing those in the Resistance to live longer. There is hope where there is life.”

Rey's eyes shone with new light and hope, and Kylo knew he had chosen his prize wisely. “What do you ask in exchange?” Rey asked.

“In exchange, I would like you to stop restraining yourself tonight with me. I can feel your fear. Free yourself for me. Allow yourself to give in to your desires.”

“And if my only desire is to slap you in the face?”

Kylo Ren smiled at her cunning. “Then it would be well worth it.” He stood up. “It's your choice. I offer my mercy in exchange for one night of your freedom from restraint. I will wait for you in the bunks.”

He left her dreams.


	13. Chapter 13

Rey's heart was heavy with both desire and fear, and with Ben gone from her mind, loneliness threatened her once more. Ben's offer was not unreasonable. The Resistance needed to preserve lives now more than ever, and one night of letting go honestly sounded as amazing as it was terrifying, but what would come the next day?

She thought on the vision of her pregnancy and cringed. She wasn't ready for that, but perhaps Ben would understand.

Rey woke herself and found Ben sitting cross-legged and studying her from the other bunk in loose, black, long-sleeve cotton pajamas. She felt a mix of disappointment and relief to see he had intended to sleep with a shirt on. She had wondered earlier. “Well?” he asked when she didn't speak.

Rey blushed. “If we do this, I want to draw a line at anything with… permanent implications.”

Ben inhaled sharply. “The vision. You're not ready.”

“I'm not,” Rey admitted. “Is that a problem?”

Ben shook his head. “I don't want you to do anything you'll regret. I want far more than nine months with you, Rey.”

Rey nodded, and blinking back tears from her fear, she asked, “Now what?”

Ben looked her in the eye and she felt him reach out to her with the force. His desire and nervousness mingled with her own. “What do you want to do?”

“I want to touch you,” she said. Ben opened his arms in welcome and raised an eyebrow when she didn't move. She sucked in a breath, exhaled, and moved to stand before him. She reached a shaky hand up to his face and cradled his jawline. He leaned into it and caressed her hand with his own.

“May I kiss your hand?” he asked her. She nodded, unable to speak, and watched as he brought her hand to his mouth and kissed the palm. Her whole body felt like a powered wire, craving release, and she had no idea what she might do if she let go. She took a deep breath. Tonight was for letting go. “What next, Rey?”

“Your shirt. Take it off,” she found herself saying. He seemed surprised at the request as well, but he did as she asked, allowing her to see his gorgeous chest again, and since these pants were not high-waisted, she saw his abs for the first time as well. She inhaled sharply. He was magnificent.

“And now?” he asked. She startled, and he smiled gently. “Would you like to stop?” She shook her head quickly and blushed deeply. “You don't have to hold back, Rey. All of me welcomes all of you.” She nodded, and she slowly traced her trembling hand down his neck to his collarbone, then down the center of his chest to his belly button. Ben panted. “I am yours, Rey.”

“Then kiss me,” she croaked.

Ben cradled her head with one hand to pull her down to him, but he hesitated before actually meeting her lips. “Are you sure?” he asked.

She glared and closed the distance in response, lips furiously and inexpertly mashing against his before finding a more rhythm together. She felt her fears slide away in favor of her increasing passion, and she opened her mouth to suck on his bottom lip. He moaned, and she placed both of her hands on his shoulders, exploring the shape of them before dragging them down his back and bringing them around to his abdomen and daring to finally touch his chest.

This whole time, he kept his hands to her head and her own hands, not once attempting to explore her body. She wondered what he was waiting on, then remembered that he had put her in charge.

She broke their kiss off, grabbed his hands, and placed them on her shoulders. She looked into his eyes and waited to see what he would do, but he kept still other than returning her gaze.

 _Touch me._ She demanded through the force.

 _Where?_ He asked.

_Anywhere._

Ben seized her butt and lifted her onto his lap, sucking her neck. His hands roamed, and Rey lost sight of everything but her passion for him.


	14. Chapter 14

The bunks were designed to hold one person each, but Kylo Ren was wrapped up with Rey in one all the same. Rey still trembled from their encounter, and Kylo was little more steady. He had known Rey to be passionate and forward, but he still hadn't expected to be the voice of reason when she forgot her earlier declaration not to do anything permanent.

He certainly hadn't expected to have to use the force to put her to sleep when she attacked him over the matter, demanding he ignore her prior conviction in the heat of her lust.

He smiled and gently kissed the top of her head. She murmured in her sleep, and her eyes shot open. “Oh kriff…” She rolled over to face him. “Did you put me to sleep again?”

“I was in very real danger of being raped,” he said solemnly, but he smiled at her. He had only held back for the sake of her request, which she should well knew. “Your fury at being denied was beautiful. Still, I had promised I wouldn't let anything permanent happen.”

Mortification filled Rey's face, and she slid out of his arms onto the metal floor. “I feel like I'm going to be sick. I didn't know I would… get like that.”

“You are one with the force, which thrives on emotions. Passion is simply another one. It is not unusual for force users to lose themselves in it. I've seen it before, though not so… intimately.” He leaned on an elbow to meet her eyes. “You have nothing to be ashamed of. I had a wonderful time.”

Rey furrowed her brow at him. “You didn't lose your mind,” she accused.

“I spent over a decade hiding all emotions but my rage and fear from Snoke. You have not needed to practice such self-control. What you experienced was natural.”

Kylo heard a sob and froze. She wasn’t supposed to cry over being with him, especially when she had taken the lead and nothing permanent happened. _Do you regret it?_ He asked through the force. He was too afraid to ask any other way.

Rey didn't answer his question. _You'll keep your end of the bargain, right?_

Kylo's heart chilled. Had the Resistance been her true motivation after all? Perhaps he would always fall second to the Resistance in her heart, just as he had with everyone else close to him. “I will keep my word,” he said quietly, breathing slow and steady to delay the oncoming avalanche of his heart. “May I do anything for you?”

Rey shook her head, still crying softly. Kylo Ren waited a moment in case she changed her mind, then left with his lightsaber for something to unleash the spiral of fury that was consuming him the more he went over what had happened.

He had let her take the lead. He hadn't once touched her without her permission. She had agreed, requested, and in the end begged for him. And now she sobbed at the memory? Was it that awful? Why then did she even go through it? She could have stopped at any time. Did she feel the need to do more than she wanted to ensure the protection of the Resistance? Did she have so little faith in him?

He let out an anguished growl, glanced around the room for something not vital to the ship, and took his lightsaber to the holo game table, stabbing and slicing it until only a pile of metal and wires remain. When he finished, Kylo Ren collapsed before it, feeling emptier than ever. His face was wet, and he wondered if he had cried too.

Ben. Rey's voice was in his head. He shook his head, not wanting to talk to her in this moment. He wanted to feel nothing. He felt the force shift around him, and he closed his eyes rather than see her anguished face. “Ben,” she said. “Please don't ignore me.”

He breathed in and out slowly, trying to empty his mind of all emotions. He heard her walk up behind him, and her small, slender arms wrapped around him from behind in a tight hug.

“Ben, I'm sorry I reacted that way. I was scared. I've never… I've never even been kissed before. Please don't misunderstand me.”

Kylo Ren exhaled slowly. It had been too long since he cleared his mind, and everything seemed clearer now. He had been foolish to hope they could put the war aside, even for one night. “I just realized… as long as the war is between us, there’s a chance that you’ll do something with me for the Resistance that you wouldn’t do with me for yourself. I won’t have any way of knowing whether you will regret it and resent me for it.”

Rey sobbed, clinging to him tightly. “No, Ben, no. That’s not what happened.”

Her pleas seemed strangely distant. “After all, you kept your distance until I shared my own desire for you. Do not fear that I am angry, Rey. It makes sense that a scavenger would make use of even my discarded feelings. I would have been more careful except for that vision. Not all visions come true though. Perhaps the force has been manipulating me as well.”

“Ben, please believe me, please. Don't do this to me. I do want you. Ben, can’t you see that I love you?”

Ben opened his eyes finally to look at her. “You love the Resistance,” he said, his own heart anguished. He saw her eyes widen in fear in the split second before the connection ended.

Ben returned to his meditation. He had cleared his mind of a thousand pains before, and he would clear it of this as well. He centered his soul and reached out into the force, the same way he had when he was still Luke's student, and connected himself to the universe. He found Rey quickly, though she was barely recognizable for the conflict within her. Well, that was to be expected. Chewie's spirit was familiar and unexpectedly welcome. Beyond the Falcon were the TIE fighters escorting them, and beyond that, a star destroyer captained by Hux.

Kylo’s eyes shot open and he laughed. The fool had come to him. He wouldn’t need to assemble the knights for a drawn-out civil war after all. He could reclaim leadership simply by knocking the head off.

Kylo leapt to his feet and dashed to the cockpit. “Chewie, we have incoming!”


	15. Chapter 15

Rey was a mess. Her head pounded from crying so hard. Her face and nightshirt were caked in tears and snot, and she was drowning in her devastation. She thought she had known it before, but being shut off from Ben shook her core.

She was still reeling when he entered her head. Hope colored her thoughts briefly, but quickly faded.  _ Guns. Now. General Hux has found us. We're under attack _ . Then she was alone again.

Rey nodded, even though there was no one to see it, and jogged to the turret below the Falcon. On any other occasion, she would have demanded to pilot, but isolation and destroying things suited her current mood very well.

She tapped into the hurt and anger she felt and embraced the darkness of the force around her.  _ How do I know which ships to attack? _ She asked Ben.

_ You don't, unless it's in defense, Rey. We will need to let him capture us to minimize losses. I will remove him once I'm on board.  _

_ Once we're on board _ . Rey corrected. She was met with silence, and her fury grew.

True to plan, the Millenium Falcon was caught in a tractor beam and brought aboard. The TIE fighters escorting them were brought aboard as well, and Rey wondered if they were following orders, and if so, whose.

Rey left her station and joined Ben and Chewie at the ramp, waiting until the ship fully stopped before opening it. A squadron of stormtroopers waited for them, blasters trained on Ben and Rey. 

“Shoot them!” cried a voice on a loudspeaker. The stormtroopers flinched, as if trying, but no shots were fired. Rey looked to Ben, who held up one hand. All the blasters went into the air, as well as a couple stormtroopers who held on by reflex. Ben waited until they dropped off, then flung the blasters across the hangar. Ben pulled out his lightsaber and turned it on. “Leave,” he stated. Rey felt the suggestion go through the force, but she was still shocked when the stormtroopers knelt down and saluted him as one before standing up and marching away. 

Beside her, Ben took a deep breath. “Good. Hux has not interfered with their conditioning.” A moment later, an ion blast rocked the Falcon from a nearby fighter, knocking them down the ramp. 

Ben waved, and every ship and fighter in the hangar turned inward, guns away from the Falcon. He pulled himself to his feet and somehow magnified his voice, for though he didn't shout, Rey could hear him echoing everywhere.

“Your Supreme Leader has returned. Bring the traitor General Hux before me immediately.” 

Rey felt the force suggestion come from Ben to the entire ship, and an ocean of hatred poured out towards Hux. Rey struggled to retain her own feelings without being swept away in the storm, but she had slept poorly, and too much had happened with Ben that she hadn't truly been ready for, both physically and emotionally. She may as well have tried to keep her footing in a sandstorm.

Rey wobbled as she felt her own emotions blur with the hate she felt around her and then sharpen into a rage against the man with red hair that everyone focused on. She gave up her battle against the dark side and felt power flood her. Hux was being dragged towards them from another deck. She was a mountain before a twig. It would be so easy to make it snap.

She heard a sharp intake of breath next to her, and her world went dark.


	16. Chapter 16

Kylo Ren caught Rey as she slumped unconscious into his arms. He had barely stopped her in time. While Hux was a vile human being, Kylo did not intend to kill him. Furthermore, he suspected Rey would deeply regret killing someone using the force. It marked a person.

“She's alright, Chewie,” Kylo said, though he feared for her stability. “She was about to kill someone, so I stopped her. That’s all,” Kylo said. Chewie had been watching silently, clearly bewildered by the displays of the Kylo’s power and Rey's sudden collapse. Kylo knew Chewie was worried about Rey though, even if he hadn’t asked yet. Kylo was too. She had resisted his mind probe when they first met and several times since. He had not expected her to succumb to his force suggestion against Hux. Guilt struck him as he realized his own situation with her may have caused her unbalance.

Regardless, Rey was dangerous until she could find herself again, and he could not allow her to wander the Star Destroyer in this state. And since Chewbacca would not allow her to be locked away while he was free, he had to take them both captive. Kylo sighed. The sooner he let Chewie know what was going on, the less chaos this would cause in the long run. “I owe you an apology, Chewie. I will be forced to introduce you and Rey as my prisoners.”

Chewie roared at him.

Kylo Ren glared back at him. “Rey is too dangerous to be let free right now. This will raise less questions anyway. Do not fear. I will be kind, but I cannot let you free. Please do not fight me. I have no desire to hurt you, but I will if forced.”

Chewie moaned sadly, but he did not protest further.

Rows of fresh stormtroopers filed into the hangar, saluting Kylo Ren when they came to a stop. The new imperial guard itself escorted a bound Hux before him.

“Hux,” Kylo Ren said calmly.

“Kylo Ren,” Hux spat. Kylo Ren circled Hux slowly. Rey was still tucked into his arms, and Hux eyed her suspiciously. “The pregnant Jedi, I presume?”

Kylo paused. He had forgotten the rumor amidst everything. Many of the stormtroopers glanced quickly in his direction, despite their training. May as well address the elephant in the room. “The Jedi is mine, and anyone caught treating her or her companion unkindly will personally answer to me.” The stormtroopers were still glancing at them, and Kylo sighed. Maybe they all needed reconditioning. “Remember your training or you'll be on the next shipment to the prison labor camps.”

All stormtrooper heads abruptly faced forward, and Kylo returned his attention to Hux. “Now what do I do with you, Hux? The labor camps would be too good for you. Your attempted assassination was quite brilliant, after all. You nearly succeeded.”

“How… how… how did you escape?” Hux asked. Kylo Ren raised an eyebrow, ignored his question, and continued his slow circle around Hux.

“I think that I will keep you near. Perhaps you will prove useful the next time I feel the need to… what did you call them? Have a little temper tantrum?” 

Hux's already-pale face turned white. Kylo did not usually enjoy frightening people, but Hux was an exception.

Kylo Ren turned to the guard. “Follow me. You too, Wookie,” he said, glancing behind at Chewbacca. His people did not need to know now how familiar he and Chewie were. He gazed back down at Rey in his arms. He would need to keep her away from anyone she could influence and hope it was enough to keep both her and the crew safe until he knew what her mental state was.

“Guard, I am not familiar with the prison layout on this ship. Is there a wing that only I may access?”

The lead guard responded, “Access codes may be changed. However, this man,” he nudged Hux before continuing, “is the only person currently in possession of the codes to do so.”

Kylo Ren nodded. “That won't be a problem. Can they be changed following retrieval?”

“Yes, Supreme Leader.”

“Thank you. Take us there.”

Kylo Ren would extract the information from Hux’s mind and leave him in a cell there along with Rey and Chewie. He didn’t want anyone else near any of them. He and Hux would have to have a long chat later about the First Order, including what possessed Hux to chase after them instead of playing it safe. Then again, he had addressed Rey as the pregnant Jedi. Perhaps Hux had come after him directly following the rumors. Foolish, since Kylo Ren had easily been able to sway the minds of those on the Star Destroyer to capture them instead of destroying them. The vision had changed much. He could only hope it was still true.

Rey stirred slightly in his arms, and Kylo used the force to gently put her back to sleep. He did not know how much of her desire for him was hers instead of her desire to help the Resistance, but he would keep her safe, and he would keep their bargain.

He would do better than keep their bargain. He had not tried to contact his mother in years via the force. He had managed to hide that particular ability from Snoke, lest Snoke use it to locate and crush her. However, Snoke was dead, and it was time that they talk.


	17. Chapter 17

Rey woke up alone on a thin white mattress in a small gray room. Her head was foggy, and her mood felt dark, almost sinister. She climbed off the mattress and looked for a way to open the sole door to the room.

There was none.

She was trapped.

Rey panicked for half a moment before remembering she had the force. She tried to reach out, but felt her own turbulent mood disrupting her focus. She took a deep breath, entering her calming ritual. Breathe, stretch, and empty the mind of all emotions except peace.

She reached into the force again, and she could see.

She was in the star destroyer, and hundreds of people were on the ship with her. Most of them were human, which made it easy to find Chewie nearby in a cell like hers. There were also vermin and the occasional larger scavenger near the garbage areas. Luke had once told Rey that he had jumped into a garbage compactor to escape stormtroopers on the death star. Rey hoped she would be more fortunate.

Of course, if Ben had reclaimed the Supreme Leader position, she shouldn’t be in a cell. Had Hux somehow won? Ben wouldn't keep her prisoner after everything they had been through, would he?

She paused, thinking it through, and slumped down. Of course Ben would take her prisoner. They were still at war, and he thought their relationship was her ruse to manipulate him.

Well, she would just have to set that straight. If she could convince Luke Skywalker to teach her, surely she could convince Ben that she cared about him.

Rey opened herself to the force again, searching for Ben this time. She found him easily, though he looked different now in the force--less conflicted, less dark. He noticed her examination, and the conflict within him grew.

 _You're awake._ He thought to her. Rey frowned, just now realizing she didn't remember when or where she had fallen asleep.

 _I’m in a prison cell._ Rey thought back to him. _What happened?_

There was a pause. _You don't remember? You were a second away from snapping Hux's neck when I put you in a force sleep._

Rey's eyes flared and she startled, backing up as if it would help her escape the truth. She remembered now, and she retched just recalling how fully enveloped she had been in the dark side. Had she really intended to kill someone with the force when that person was already captive?

_Let go of the past, Rey. You lost yourself to the conflict within you, but that does not mean you must stay lost. Let your shame go._

Rey struggled to calm herself and failed. Luke was right to have doubted her. She was no Jedi. She had succumbed to temptation too many times to call herself a Jedi. She was no better than anyone else. The only thing heroic about her was her power with the force. She sobbed as grief set in and shut out Ben’s attempts to talk to her in her mind.

“Rey,” Ben said at her side. He knelt down beside her and stroked her hair, still loose from when she had showered. She hadn't even noticed the force connecting them this time. “It is easy to fall to the dark side, but if you cling to who you are instead of what you have done, it is also easy to find your way back.”

Rey took a deep breath, then another, while Ben calmly stroked her hair. “That's it. Let it go.”

“Why did you stop me from killing him?” Rey asked.

Ben stopped his hand, letting it rest on her shoulder. “I needed him alive.” He paused. “I also wished to spare you grief. You would have regretted killing him.”

Rey took more deep breaths, trying to calm herself. She had a thousand questions for him. Did he hate her? Why was he still helping her? She glanced around the room, recalling that she had been trapped when she reached out. “Am I a prisoner?”

“Yes,” Ben said simply.

“Why?” Rey asked. He looked at her, but there was no kindness in his gaze, just a studious, professional examination, like she might give a malfunctioning piece of equipment. Her heart shuddered under it, recognizing that he didn’t trust her. “You think I intend to sabotage you?”

“You nearly killed Hux, Rey.”

Rey’s heart raced in fear at being trapped, and it brought to mind his own fears when he had been trapped on the ship heading into the sun, but he hadn’t been trapped. He had used the force to escape through her, and she could do the same through him.

She watched him carefully, wondering whether she should simply leap onto him as he had done to her, or if it would be better to find some other way to convince him to let her be in his lap. “Do you hate me?” she asked quietly.

“Never,” he said, and she could see his passion return to his eyes with the admission.

Rey bit her lip and looked him in the eyes. He calmly returned her gaze, and neither looked away as she slowly crawled into his lap. “I won’t let you keep me here,” she said.

“I know,” he said. “But you cannot escape me.” Rey tucked herself into his lap so that she broke contact with the floor and found herself still on him in another room. She dropped the force connection immediately. If Ben was surprised, he didn’t show it. He didn’t even try to stop her as she carefully backed off him and ran to the nearest exit, slamming the panel to open the door. The light flashed red. She tried again, and it was still red. Too late she saw the number pad next to it. The door was locked.

“As I said, you cannot escape me.” Rey turned to face Ben and found he was sitting on the edge of a large, circular bed with a black mattress and white sheets. “I expected this, so I had the room locked with a code. The key to escape is in my mind, but I do not think you desire to fall so deeply into the darkness that you would force it out.”

“You won’t always be in this room!” Rey snapped. She would just use their force connection to escape later when he was gone.

Ben nodded gently. “I will keep you contained while necessary, even if it means carrying you around this ship in a force-sleep.”

Rey trembled. He must mean to trap her until the war was over, and perhaps even then. “And if I strangle you in your sleep?” Rey asked, letting her fear get the better of her.

Ben merely raised an eyebrow. “Would you?”

They both knew the time when she would have followed through on such an action was long past. Rey closed her eyes as she accepted that he had captured her thoroughly for now. She would just have to find a way to escape later, but she was so dizzy with all the emotions flooding through her that she could hardly think straight.

She had thought she was a Jedi who could resist the darkness. She had thought she could trust Ben not to betray her. He had even said he would not force her to fight free of him again, and he imprisoned Chewie too.

“What about Chewie?” Rey asked after a moment.

“I have negotiated his release, and the release of the Millenium Falcon, to the Resistance. I have no reason to keep him here.”

Rey forgot her own troubles in an instant and took a step towards him. “I thought the Order didn’t negotiate with the Resistance.”

Ben shook his head. “Snoke fed on fear and suffering, and so he wanted to annihilate the Resistance. However, he is no longer giving the orders, and I am not Snoke. It is time for the war to end, for many reasons. I’m releasing Chewie and the Falcon as a show of my good intentions. In exchange, they will acknowledge that FN-2187 is a war criminal and return him to me.”

“His name is Finn,” Rey corrected him, anger in her voice. “And they won’t return him. They would never turn on him like that. He’s a hero of the Resistance!”

Ben stared at her a moment, then continued. “I am aware. My mother already informed me that he had conveniently escaped with some woman named Rose before they could capture him, and their tractor beams had a temporary malfunction at the time and could not stop them.” He lifted his eyebrows at her as if in mock shock. “How surprising. I won’t fault my mother for holding to her values, but he won’t be able to enter First Order space without risking arrest.”

Rey marveled that Finn and Rose had escaped together and that Ben didn’t even seem particularly bothered by it. Furthermore, Ben had actually spoken with his mother for the first time in over a decade.

Ben continued. “Regardless, the Resistance and the First Order will be entering negotiations for terms of peace.”


	18. Chapter 18

Kylo watched shock wash away Rey’s anger, and she sank to the floor. He had been monitoring her conflict closely through the force. He would only contain her until he could trust that she was the master of her emotions again, though this conversation was sending her all over the place. “Peace? Between the First Order and the Resistance? How?”

“You were not expecting this,” Kylo said. He had thought she would assume such a turn at this point, given her knowledge of his own values and desires. “Are you so surprised that I would work with them? I do not wish to see people suffer or live in fear anymore than the Resistance does. Such dark feelings invite chaos and anarchy. I will happily eliminate slavery and oppression where I can identify it to maintain peace and order. The main points of conflict will be the usual political nonsense about leadership and how to handle future conflicts.”

“Why now?” Rey asked. “Why not right away after Snoke died?”

Ah, so that was why she was confused. Kylo pulled himself to his feet and took a cautious step towards her. “Two reasons. First, I did not dare discuss peace while Luke lived. The Resistance would have insisted that he be kept close at hand, and I could not trust that I would not wake up to his lightsaber again.” He took another step closer. “Second, I have both more leverage and motivation to end the war now.” He maintained his gaze on her until she understood he was speaking of her.

“Leverage?” Rey echoed. Confusion, rage, and terror emanated from her through the force. “Am I a bargaining chip? Is that why you released Chewie and not me?”

Kylo frowned and shook his head. Did she think she was captive for his benefit? “You are leverage as someone that both the Resistance and I trust. My mother would be foolish not to fear that I might become another Emperor Palpatine or Supreme Leader Snoke, and I expect she will want someone capable of stopping me at my side, involved in all my affairs, in order to allow my reign. You are the only person qualified.”

Kylo Ren watched as Rey showed surprise, then suspicion, and more confusion. Why was she confused? It was so obvious that this was the path they were meant to follow. How could she not see it? “Rey, we had visions where we stood at each other’s side. Yours was in the Resistance. Mine was in the First Order.”

Rey nodded warily. “Our visions would be fulfilled,” Rey said. He closed the distance, standing before her, but not touching her. She still had too much conflict within her, and he did not know what she wanted. They both looked to her womb. Rey spoke up first. “You said you thought the force was manipulating you.”

Kylo flinched, recalling and regretting his reaction to her own grief following their night together. He had fled to the force, and in doing so doubted what the force had already shown him. “I don’t know. I did not envision then that Hux would be so foolish as to come after me himself, which allowed me to easily reinstate myself. Now many things are possible.”

Rey backed up a step, and fear clenched his own heart. “Many things are possible, but not having me as your equal when you hold me as a prisoner.”

Kylo Ren stepped back himself and studied her. Could he free her now? He wondered briefly if he would see her again once she left, but he shoved that thought away. She was right. He would never have her while she wasn’t free. He had imprisoned her to make sure she could not cause harm while she was lost to the dark side. Her conflict was still all over the place, but she had not done anything to suggest that she would give in to the fear and anger in her heart. He had no reason to keep her here now beyond his own desire for her companionship.

He would miss her.

He took a deep breath, taking in this memory even as she stared defiantly at him. He loved her like this. From the first time they met, she was ready to fight him for what she valued. She never backed down, even when it was defending her faith in him from Luke. He would have to trust in the force to bring them back together. Perhaps, while working together for the First Order, she would come to love him for himself.

He stepped around her, keyed in the passcode to leave his rooms along with the retinal scan, and raised an eyebrow at her when she didn’t immediately follow.

“You’re freeing me?” she asked him.

“As you see it. We’ll get Chewie next, and then the Falcon. I hadn’t had time to release them since the negotiations,” Kylo said, walking briskly along and ignoring the looks of the personnel walking by. He glanced down at Rey and noted she was still in that silly wookie night-shirt. He paused before the next officer they encounter. “You, please collect a spare officer uniform and leave it on the Millenium Falcon.”

“For you, Supreme Leader?” the officer asked, taking in Kylo Ren’s size. Kylo Ren shook his head and nodded to Rey. The officer gasped. “Oh, right away, Supreme Leader.”

“Are you making me an officer?” Rey asked him skeptically as the officer strode away.

“You should have something better to wear the next time you have a laundry day. I thought you would prefer the officer garb to stormtrooper armor. I would get you proper clothes, but there are limited options on a Star Destroyer.”

“Thank you,” Rey said.

Her reunion with Chewbacca was everything Kylo Ren expected. The big wookie hugged her fiercely and gave Kylo no shortage of suspicious, questioning glances while interrogating Rey on everything that happened.

The Falcon was where they had left it and in good condition, but Kylo Ren had not counted on Marx to be there waiting for them, sitting on a large chest on the ramp for the Falcon.

“Howdy, Master Kylo!” Marx said as they approached. He was fully dressed as a Knight of Ren, complete with the daunting mask that was so very contradictory to his personality. “I was going to head to your chambers to talk personally, but the ship’s abuzz with news that you were leading your lady here directly. Is this her?”

Kylo Ren sighed. “Take off the mask, Marx. She’s got a thing against them. Marx, this is Rey and her companion Chewbacca. Rey, Chewbacca, this is Marx. He’s a Knight of Ren, and oversees our school for force talents.”

Marx removed the mask and smiled at them, as much as one can smile with a beak mouth. “It’s an honor to meet you, Lady Rey. I actually have some gifts for you… Wan’s suggestion. She’s another Knight of Ren and helps me out with the school. Definitely glad she suggested it too, given your attire. Seriously, Master, I don’t want to question your judgment, but how could you allow the mother of your child to wander your Star Destroyer in a nightshirt?”

Kylo pursed his lips. He knew better than to even try to explain the situation to Marx at this point. Chewie bellowed in shock though, looking at Rey.

“Ben!” Rey exclaimed.

Then again, he wasn’t the only one involved in this situation. “Marx, come here,” he said, not wanting to shout the clarification. Marx stepped closer. “I had a vision of Rey pregnant with my child. A future vision. She’s not pregnant yet.”

Marx’s eyes got very round, and he seemed to shrink in on himself. “Oooh… Are you certain?” he asked. Kylo gave raised an eyebrow at him. “Oooooh! So you haven’t… well, that’s awkward.” Marx glanced at the chest and back at Rey. “But you know, it doesn’t change a whole lot whether she uses these clothes in a few months or in a few years. Just hang onto them, Lady Rey.”

Marx lifted the chest and revealed that it was full of gowns and other clothing that flowed loose around the belly. “All designed to grow with you! We want you to be comfortable.”

Rey and Chewie stared in shocked silence.

 _Thank him if you want this over with sooner._ Kylo thought to her. Rey jumped and faced Marx. “Umm, thank you.”

“You’re welcome! Well, I’ll get out of your way, unless you would be needing me for something,” Marx said. “By the way, good job on taking out Hux. We thought you would have some kind of long, drawn-out battle… what happened?”

“The fool exposed himself by showing up personally to take us out following the rumor you spread,” Kylo Ren explained. “I should say thank you, but your life will become very unpleasant if you spread rumors of Rey again. You’re dismissed, Marx.”

Marx nodded and sheepishly darted away to a different freighter. “He’s not what I expected,” Rey said.

“No one is,” Kylo said, shaking his head. “Rey, you have your ship. You have Chewbacca. You have your freedom, and apparently you also have a new wardrobe if you desire it.”

Kylo watched Rey walk up the ramp without a glance back. Chewie glanced back, moaned sadly, then picked up the chest of maternity clothing and carried it on board. After a minute, the engine started, though the ramp remained open.

Kylo Ren gritted his teeth against the loss he felt coursing through his soul. She was leaving without so much as a wave in farewell. Of course, that was how they had always parted in the force connections. Perhaps this was the same.

He took a deep breath in and a deep breath out. This was not the end. They would meet again. They could not avoid it while the force connected them, and surely she would be involved in his future leadership as part of the negotiations with the Resistance. He carefully counted during breathing until he could unclench his fists.

Rey would not give up on him like his mother and father did--like Uncle Luke did. She would reach out again.

Kylo Ren turned around to walk away, unable to bear actually watching her leave, when he heard footsteps on the ramp.

“Ben!”

Kylo Ren looked behind him, and there she was, fully dressed in her own clothes with her hair tied up in her usual style. He trembled, now terrified of prolonging the separation when she was leaving in a few minutes anyway.

“Ben, if I stayed… would I still be a prisoner?”

Kylo Ren shook his head. Perhaps he should never have imprisoned her, but he had not known what else to do following her dive into the dark side when she attempted to murder Hux. “You would be my honored guest.”

Rey nodded. “The force sleep trick. I want to learn how to do it and how to resist it.”

Kylo turned around fully to face her as she strode towards him. “You want me to teach you?” he asked, wide-eyed. Teaching her would mean she was staying. He had expected her to leave.

Rey nodded. “What? Is the offer no longer good?”

“No, it’s good. It’s very good.”

Rey smirked. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“How am I looking at you?” he asked.

Rey reached him and gently cupped the side of his face with her hand. Kylo closed his eyes and leaned into her touch. “You were looking at me like you were afraid I would disappear.”

“I didn’t think you would stay. I was afraid.”

“Don’t be. You’re not alone.” She fell quiet, and he opened his eyes to see her gazing away. He followed her gaze to see Marx watching them from a distance with a dumb grin, his mask in his hand.

“Ben, if I become one of your students, am I going to have to wear that stupid outfit and mask?”

Kylo Ren chuckled softly and took her hand in his. “No. You’re perfect as you are.”


	19. Epilogue

_ Some time later... _

“I still think you’re crazy for trusting him,” Finn said for the hundredth time that day since coming on board the Supreme Leader Kylo Ren’s lead Star Destroyer as Rey’s personal guest. It was their first time seeing each other since the Resistance and the First Order agreed on peace terms. Part of the agreement had been that Finn would be arrested on sight if found by the First Order, but Rey had negotiated a new agreement.

Rey laughed. “Well it’s not like he trusts you either. He was furious when I insisted on your pardon as a wedding gift to me.” 

“I was right though when we talked last. It was a proposal! Rey, how could you marry him? He’s the grandson of Darth Vader!”

“And the son of Han Solo and General Organa. I finally have a last name. I wonder what Han would have thought.”

Finn glowered at her. “Have you forgotten that the reason we will never know Han’s opinion is because the creature you married murdered him!?”

Rey had heard Ben’s explanation of what happened that day, of how Snoke was the one to activate the blade when Ben was pleading for help. He had wanted to go with Han, and he begged Rey to never tell another soul of how deeply he let his father down in that moment.

Rey shrugged. “You just don’t know him like I do,” she said with a sad smile. Finn threw his hands up in a huff and stalked around the room. “So how are you and Rose? I saw her last week, you know.”

Finn sputtered and immediately crossed his arms three different ways in his nervousness. “She’s… umm… she’s great. You know. Great.”

“She told me she’s puking every three minutes and wants to eject you into space without an escape pod on principle for fathering this pregnancy.”

Finn’s face blanched, but he crossed his arms again, tried to casually lean against a wall that wasn’t there, caught himself, and crossed his arms. “Like, I said, she’s great. Absolutely great. You know, she’s got a lot of support from Kaydel and General Leia, and I’m just not sure...”

“She needs you more than anyone, Finn. Stop avoiding her just because her moods scare you. Pregnancy is scary enough without wondering why your husband isn’t around. Besides, she won’t actually kill you. She’ll want you around to help her change diapers in a few months.”

The tint of Finn’s face went from white to green. He nodded nervously and pointed at the door. “Yea, so maybe I should go… and umm.. Check on her.”

Rey smiled and shook her head as Finn ran out of the room. “He’s gone, Ben. You know you don’t have to keep your eye on me constantly like this. People are bound to wonder why you’re always so distracted.”

Ben leaned his head against hers through the force connection and rubbed her thigh. “I’m surprised you didn’t tell him.”

Rey snorted. “He’s already furious that we’re together. I can barely get him to talk about anything else, though it’s been months since we last saw each other. How would he react if he found out I was carrying your child? And we just finally cleared up the rumors from when Marx misunderstood your vision to be a current fact.”

Ben smiled and leaned down to kiss her belly, still flat in the early weeks of pregnancy. 


End file.
